In Reality...

"I hate when my boyfriend says someone in a movie is sooooo attractive and I am her complete opposite and it happens to be one of my favorite movies because now I can’t watch it without feeling outrageously insecure." - via abakesacake. I saw this statement on Tumblr. And, it made me feel a certain way. Everyone finds some celebrity attractive. We have different reasons for feeling that way. But, the reality is that those crushes aren't real. They are purely physical. We don't know anything about these celebs. We know the characters they portray, the songs they sing & the clothes they wear. None of that should have any bearing on one's real life relationships.




I have a thing for Idris Elba. That accent, that face, that chocolate skin make me smile. I liked him as Stringer Bell on "The Wire." I like his movies. His pictures are always nice. But, I do not know who personally about this man. I do not fawn over him in front of my guy. I also have a thing for Paul Walker. He is a blond, blue eyed, white man. The complete opposite of my Love. But, I like what I see in him anyway. Just like I know my guy has a soft spot for Rosario Dawson, who looks nothing like me, and Jill Scott. They do something for him. Am I threatened by it? No. Should it? Absolutely not. Why would it? I know why I love him & vice versa. A crush on a celeb means nothing.




I think that sometimes people get so caught up in the insecurities that they lose sight of the realities. I would be a fool to let that make me question my relationship. The reality is I'm me. And that's who my Love wants to be with. Just like he is the one I want. If we are so quick to make a thousand insignificant rules inside our relationship, we're doomed to fail. I'm not here to tell him what to do, how to feel or where not to look. He is a grown man dealing with a grown woman. No one here needs to be led. We're together but neither of us are suddenly blind. We both may see someone attractive. That's life. Anyone who thinks otherwise is already on a collision course with failure. I'm not here for that.