Saturday, January 31, 2015

Ladies Love Lyrics: Anita Baker's "Talk To Me"

Anita Baker's voice & music are both timeless. She is perfection and classic. I love her. This morning while my AB Spotify radio channel played, this song came on and caught my attention. I've always liked it. But, it resonated today because of a current situation in my life. I'm not a big fan of people who shut down emotionally. It disturbs my spirit on so many levels. I cannot be there for you if you do not "Talk To Me." It;s that simple. I am frustrated but Anita worked it out for me. I've done my part, done the work. That's all I can do. And, now, I'm going to listen to Anita and vibe for a little while longer. Get into these classic lyrics below and song above. Enjoy!! 
"Ooh, baby, baby, baby
You stand all alone on your own
Please come inside from the storm
Stand where it's warm, I can see you're in need
Baby, please talk to me now
Swear nothin' is wrong, you're so strong
Baby don't hold this inside
Relax your pride let it go, set it free
My baby, talk to me now
What's wrong, wrong with you?
Why don't you tell me what you're going through, darlin'?

What's wrong, wrong with you?
Why don't you tell me what you're going through?
I can help you if you let me baby, yes I can
I understand, here's my hand
Why stand alone in the dark open up your heart
Let this go, set it free
Now my baby, talk to me now..."

Friday, January 23, 2015

Bible Talk

When you constantly see or hear something, you tend to take notice. This is what happened to me last year. I was bombarding with Bible verses from Romans 8. I kept seeing Romans 8:28 as well as 8:35. After seeing them for about a week, I had to go to my Bible and read them. Once I started reading, I remembered the chapter very well. In the past, I had an in-depth conversation about this specific chapter in Romans. I had someone explain this to me in great detail. It's a very interesting chapter in the Bible. I've spent countless moment thinking that I wasn't good enough for one reason or another. Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." There is something about those words that fill me with so much hope.

Romans 8 has become a staple in my life. I read it often and early. It calms, centers and refocuses me. It makes me feel like I have a bigger purpose here in life. In the moments when I am doubting myself and feel at my lowest, I read it. There have always been verses that have stuck with me but this is different. I almost feel as though it was tailor made for me at this point in my life. I can say honestly that my faith has waivered a lot lately. It's so easy to get caught up in the "woe is me" life and I've been there far too long. But, the dark clouds have dissipated and I can see and feel the sun shining directly on me. I'm happier than I've been in a really long time. And, I know that prayer has a lot to do with it. I read Romans 8 more than any other chapter in the Bible in the last few months. It's helped me tremendously. I am so thankful for all the universe for conspiring to lead me to those particular words. 

Thursday, January 22, 2015

Not The Right One

Last night I was watching BET's "The Game" while attempting to go to sleep. I wasn't feeling that well. And, while I would normally be all into the show, my mind was elsewhere. So, I was dvr'ing it to watch later. Until I heard Jason Pitts utter the words above. I felt like I had been shot. I sat straight up and had to rewind it because I didn't really know what led to such an honest and hurtful admission. I watched that scene at least three times. Watched as Chardonnay's heart broke and face cracked as her husband said those words to her. How could he?? How do you fall in love with a woman, marry her, plan your future with her, re-propose, give her a big fancy wedding only to humiliate her in front of everyone?? I will never understand the mindframe of a man who is supposedly in love with a woman doing anything to hurt her. Ever. 

But, then I got to thinking about this situation. If you really love someone, you should want the best for them. Even if that means that they aren't with you. I've spent a lot of time thinking since my last breakup about love. I've seriously doubted his love for me on many late nights. I felt as if he didn't love me enough to stay. And, for far too long, that thought killed me. It made me feel less than and not worthy of love because the man I loved left me. The absence of his love filled me with self-doubt. And, honestly, I haven't worked my way totally through it. Even after the breakup, he would (and still does) compliment me and I find it hard to believe him. Hearing that I'm a good woman or a great person or that I'm pretty or sexy or intelligent doesn't have the same appeal as it did before. But, then I had an epiphany. Whatever his reasons for leaving, whether I think they were credible or not, were his own. And, the reality is, he no longer thought I was the right woman for him. In hindsight, I'm thankful for him. Because it could've been worse. We could've been married with kids. This way, I was the only one hurt. I didn't think I would survive but I did. Getting back to "The Game," I hope this heartbreak for Chardonnay leads her to the man she is supposed to spend the rest of her life with. Hell, I hope the same thing for me as well. 

Wednesday, January 07, 2015

Thoughts of a Random Thinking Woman

  • One week into #NoBareLips30 & I am still going strong. I am loving playing in my lipsticks and rocking them daily. I have about 20 new lipsticks which is more than enough for the moment. So, I won't be buying another for a minute, I swear.
  • Being super critical of yourself is tiresome. It is a habit that I have decided must go in 2015. I need to cut myself some slack on a lot of things. I 
  • It is very hard to not feel negatively towards anyone who see or hears #BlackLivesMatter and feels the need to interject with #AllLivesMatter. Because if you do not see why the first is relevant, you are so lost. Yes, all lives matter but the police are only executing Black people and leaving their blood and bodies on the streets for hours. I've lost respect for so many of my former classmates who have shown their true colors in the last few months on FB. But, it also helps cut my friends list down. I have no problem unfriending, deleting, unfollowing people I know in real life on social media. 
  • Today has been a bad hair day. Isabella (my hair) is being unruly and rude. I do not like it. Bad hair days affect my mood in the worst way. 
  • I started another blog. It's private and password protected. I need that space to get some things off my chest. I am purging. And, I do not need everyone knowing these particular thoughts. It feels great to get them out though. 
  • My friends are hilarious. I cannot stop laughing at "pass the peas like we used to do" which is a quote from the show "Martin." It makes no sense but it has had me giggling for days. Laughter is chicken soup for the soul.
  • Strangely enough, my sleeping patterns has improved tremendously. I am so thankful for that. I needed this.
  • I am missing the old Kanye. Been listening to his entire catalogue (sans Yeezy because it sucks) all year. I am not a fan of his new song. The sentiment is cute, the lyrics are nice but the song is mediocre at best. I am concerned about the direction he is moving in musically. It makes me sad. 
  • The moment you realize that your prayers have been answered and your feelings have changed is a great one. Especially because you know that without it, you would have been in line for more heartache. I am thankful.
  • I hate to admit how scared I am about so many things. Especially my uncertain, cloudy future. I don't like this feeling. But, I do not know how to shake them. 
  • I cannot remember the last time I was told I love you by a certain someone. I don't know why it's bothering me so much today. Because it really doesn't matter anymore. I used to think that love was a forever type of thing. I've learned that forever means different things to different folks. In the words of Jazmine Sullivan, "forever doesn't last too long these days."
  • I want to go on a trip somewhere. Not an international one but to a city I've never been for a few days. I need a break from everyone and everything I know and am used to. 

Sunday, January 04, 2015

Throw It In The Bag II

I have fallen head over heels for lipsticks. This is a new love. I cannot stop myself from buying a new one every single time I enter a store. It's my latest habit. I realized that I seem to buy shades in the purple, pink and burgundy family. I think they are my favorites because they look so good against my brown skin. I have been searching for this one lippie for months now. I finally found it last week. I was so happy, especially because I had 2 coupons which would be $7 off!! The shade is Revlon ColorBurst Matte Balm in Shameless. It is the most perfect shade of purple. I am in love with it. I am glad that I purchased 2 of these when I had the chance because the racist remarks of the CEO of Revlon means that I will not be supporting this brand any further. I am sickened by his stupid and ignorant words. That won't stop me from loving this lipstick though. Great purple shade for a brown skinned Black girl.  

Wet 'N Wild Cinnamon Spice is a lipstick I picked up on a whim. I wasn't sure if I was really going to like it. Plus, I had a coupon so it was cheap. Imagine my surprise when I really liked it. It has more of an orange undertone and I think it works well for me. 

NYC's Violet Shine is a pink lipstick that I have to get used to. It's a tad bit more metallic than I would like. I mixed it with a brown lipstick that I already had. It made a new shade that I liked more. Someone got this for me so I want to make sure I use it.

Maybelline's Brazen Berry is a lipstick that I had to hunt down for a while. I was so excited to find it. I thought it would be more purple on my lips but it's lilac in color for me. I still love it. This is definitely one of my absolute favorite shades. I always feel happy when I wear it. 

And, finally a new fave has to be Wet N' Wild's Cherry Bomb. I love it because it is a deep burgundy shade. It reminds me of NYC's Mahogany. I absolutely love the way it looks on me. I wear this at least once a week. It never fails to get me compliments. I promise that I won't purchase anymore lipsticks for a while. Well, with one exception, if I find the Wet 'N Wild's Sugar Plum Fairy, I have to buy it. Other than that, I am done for a while. I will wear and enjoy all the lippie's I've purchased over the last few months. What's your newest favorite lipstick? Tell me about it. What's in your makeup bag, ladies?

Saturday, January 03, 2015

Ladies Love Lyrics: Erykah Badu "Green Eyes"

It's ten minutes long and could never be a single. But, Erykah Badu's "Green Eyes" is essentially three songs wrapped in one. The beat changes three times. The lyrics are intoxicating. This has been one of my favorite by Badu since "Mama's Gun" dropped. I was reminded of its brilliance when it played on my Spotify radio a few minutes ago. Great song that everyone can relate to. I love that it is so dope that you never realize that it is ten minutes long. Great piece by Badu. PErfect choice for my "Ladies Love Lyrics" posts. Get into the lyrics and video below. 

"My eyes are green
Cause I eat a lot of vegetables
It don't have nothing to do with your new friend
My eyes are green
Cause I eat a lot of vegetables
It don't have nothing to do with your new friend

I don't care, I swear
I'm too thru with you I am
You don't mean nothing to me
So go ahead and be with your friend

My eyes are green
Cause I eat a lot of vegetables
It don't have nothing to do with your new friend
My eyes are green
Cause I eat a lot of vegetables
It don't have nothing to do with your new friend

I'm insecure
But I can't help it
My mind says move on
My heart lags behind
But I don't love you any more
I'm so insecure
Never knew that love did this
Ooh, ooh

I can't remember the last time I felt this way
About somebody
You've done something to my mind
And I can't control it
But I don't love you any more
Yes I do, I think
Loving you is wrong baby
Ooh, ooh


I'm so confused
You tried to trick me yeah
Ooh, ooh, oh
Never knew that love could hurt like this
Never thought I would but I got dissed
Makes me feel so sad and hurt inside
Feel embarrased so I want to hide
Silly me I thought your love was true
Change my name to Silly E. Badu
Before I heal, it's gonna be a while
I know it's gonna be a while, chile

I hope it's not too late
Too late, too late, too late
Feeling insecure
Your love has got me sore
I don't want no more

Oh, oh
It's too late, oh, oh ooh, ooh
I'm sorry I love you
At first it was cool
You told me you loved me too, ooh
And then you lost your love
And then you lost your love
And then you lost your love
You wanted me to go away
But I can't go
See I can't leave, it's too late
I can't leave, it's too late
I can't leave, it's too late
I can't leave, it's too late

Just make love to me
Just one more time and then you'll see
I can't believe I made a desparate plea
Believe me yeah, ye-ah, no, oh
You see I can't leave, it's too late
I can't leave, it's too late
Don't you know, I can't leave, it's too late
Can't go no where, no
It's too late
It's too late
It's too late
It's too late yeah
Come on babe

Don't you want to be strong with me
You told me we could have a family
Want to run to me when you're down and low
But times get tough and there you go
Out the door, you wanna run again
Open your arms and you'll come back in
Wanna run cause you say your afraid, afraid

Never knew what a friendship was
Never knew how to really love
You can't be what I need you to
And I don't know why I fuck with you

I know our love will never be the same
But I can't stand the growing pains."

Friday, January 02, 2015

Colorful Epiphany

As I watched the night sky light up in colorful bursts of lights, I was filled with so much hope and happiness. It's been a really long time since I felt like this. I've never been one to believe in that whole "new year, new me" slogan that folks throw around. I simply always want to be working towards being a better version of the woman I was last year. I want to be more. That has always been my only real resolution. But, this felt different. Instead of getting down on myself about things/goals I haven't accomplished yet or people/things I've lost, I silently gave thanks for all the blessings in my life. I may not be in the position I ultimately desire but I'm still here. That means I still have time to get it all and more. That was the lesson the last few years taught me. There is no progression when I allow myself to wallow in the shade that disappointment brings. I finally feel like I am standing in the sun. 

I feel so much more like myself today than I have in a really long time. I am ready to make the moves necessary for me to truly live my life. I have no clue what is coming but I know it will be amazing. Because God said so. All the tears I've cried have been watering the seeds that were planted. I cannot wait to receive my bounty.What I want most is a life that is as colorful, bright and lively as the fireworks I witnessed that night. Simply put, I want to shine. And, I will. That is a promise I am making to myself for myself. It may not be what others expect it to be but it will be mine and it will be amazing. That's my word. I resolve to be the best version of myself. I am ready for 2015!

Thursday, January 01, 2015


🎉Happy New Year 🎉!! It is 2015 and I am ready to attack it. I am looking forward to achieving all my goals and having all my dreams come true. I have already claimed it. I plan on making it a standout year. 2015 will be a stellar chapter in the book of my life. I feel it deep in my soul. I want so much and deserve so much more. I am thankful for making it through to see this year. I know that there is greatness ahead for me. Whatever my path may be, I will take it with joy in my heart and a smile on my face. I hope the same for all of you. Happy New Year, beautiful people! Let's make 2015 everything that we want it to be!!