Love Triangles

There has been so much said about the whole Rihanna/Chris Brown/Karrueche love triangle in the last week. It all seemed to come to a head last week. There were the reports of Chris out with Rihanna at night while spending days with his girlfriend Karrueche. Then, the picture of him and Rihanna at the Jay-Z concert surfaced. This was followed by subliminal tweets from Karrueche and a release from Chris in which he stated that he was ending his relationship with his girlfriend to (a) focus on his music & (b) because he didn't want her to be hurt by his friendship with Rihanna. Finally, he released a video entitled "The Real Chris Brown" to explain his dilemma. He explains that he was in love with two women at the same time and he isn't a dog. I thought about this for a minute. Can one really be in love with two at the same time?

My answer is no. For me, I am not built that way. My heart cannot be split in half at the same time. When I love, I love completely. I am deep in it. All I want is that man, the one I am in love with. I do not think humans were made that way. The heart has the capacity to love many differently. But, to be "IN LOVE" and to "LOVE" someone are totally different arenas. I think most do not know the difference. I am not saying that he doesn't have love or feel love for both women. What I am saying is that, he isn't truly in love with both of them. When you truly are in love with someone, you want the best for them. You want to protect their heart. You don't want any harm to come to them in any way. I cannot wrap my head around a man claiming to love be and giving another woman the same attention, love and affection. That is not love. It is lust. It is infatuation. It isn't real and it won't last. Love does not operate that way. Love does not hurt.

I blame a lot of what's in the 80 second video on youth. I believe that saying he was in love with them both absolves him of hurting either in his mind. In reality, it does not. I would not feel loved or special if I was in this position. When it comes to love and relationships, I want, need, desire, and deserve to be the only one and not just #1. That is what I require. To love me is to love only me. I do not share or play well with others when it comes to my heart and my man. That's just what I know. It also goes to what a person allows in a relationship. If a woman allows a man to have other relationships by staying with him, then she is getting what she deserves. I know what I would put up with. It isn't much when it comes to infidelity and bullshit. I'm worth more than that. My heart is worth more than that. Love triangles are for the young. We've all been there in some capacity. And, then you grow up. You realize what's important to you. I am 30+. I do not play young girl games. Thats' the bottom line.