Friday, March 08, 2013
A Dream Deferred
What happens when you realize your dream may not be obtainable anymore? I feel lost. There was a dream I had that I am pretty sure won't be mine. So, now I have to find a new dream or something. But, what do I do with all the plans I made? Or the feelings I have about that particular dream? I have no idea how to move pass this dream. "A Dream Deferred" by Langston Hughes came to mind when I start writing this. It def explains where I am mentally. I do not know what comes next or where I'm supposed to go. This particular dream was gargantuan. It was the biggest dream I've ever allowed myself to dream. And, it's no longer an option. At least not at this moment. That really makes me truly sad. I've kinda accepted the fact that this may never be. I didn't really have a choice.
I know none of us can predict the future. I know that all of it lays in God's hands. Since I am no longer on that dream's path, I feel myself drifting. It's hard to let go of something that it took me forever to admit that I wanted, truly wanted. I think it will be beneficial to me to let it go. I can't hold onto a dream that doesn't belong to me anymore. Maybe I should focus my attention on other dreams. I read somewhere that dreams are sometimes deferred because they aren't what God wants for us at that time. That is all I have to hold on in this matter. I know what I want. I'm just not sure how to get it yet. And, maybe that's the point. That this dream isn't mine to have yet. So, all I can do is pray and let it go and hope it comes back to me.