Tuesday, November 22, 2011

The Struggle

There are a few things that I struggle with on a daily. That's human though. I don't want everything to be perfect because honestly perfect seems boring. I just want to be able to control and handle things. That really speaks to the oldest child syndrome that I was blessed with. Firstborns don't have a choice but to be in charge. We need to run things. I guess we all have control issues. I can cook to that. It is all a huge struggle.

There are certain things going on in my life that I have no control over. Like people I love are in situations that I can't help them with. I can't fix it to them or make it better to them. That kills me. I don't like feeling useless. That is on of the worst feelings ever. To know that there is nothing in my power that can change things for them. I struggle with the fact that it's not my responsibility to fix everything for everyone. I guess that is just on of my flaws. I'm coming to accept this about myself.

I know that all I can do is let them know that I'm here for them. Tell them that my arms are open for them, I'll always be here to listen and my shoulders were built for them to lean on. It's the best thing I can think of in a situation like this. Helpless is a horrible way to feel. I know that the struggle of bar for them as well. Sometimes we all could just use a friend. In the end, that's all that really matters.


  1. It sounds like you are doing what is in your power to do Kenda. That is GREAT (of an extent, amount, or intensity considerably above the normal or average). Seems like you've been a great friend and ally.

  2. I'm trying. It's not easy at all because I wanna fix it for them. But I'm learning. Being a great friend is what I always aspire to be.