A random conversation sparked this blog. The reality is people cheat. I do not condone it at all. Probably because I grew up in it. Unfortunately, there is a cycle I've seen repeated in my family too many times. The cycle isn't specific to my family. The men cheat, the women stay. The men have kids outside of their marriages and the women stay. After all of that hurt and pain, how do they stay? How does one trust their husband after this? I don't know. I can't wrap my head around it. I also think its why I know what I will and won't accept in my relationship.
I'm a monogamous type of woman. I don't have it in me at 32 to maintain multiple relationships. I don't truly believe in divorce. But if my "husband" cheated on me and had a kid as well, there will be nothing or no one who could make me stay. It's not even a pride thing. It's more of a respectable issue. If he couldn't respect me enough to be faithful, what exactly do we have? What would there be to save? I watched my Dad repeat the same cheating cycle that his Dad did. In a way, it's almost liked learned behavior. It was acceptable on some levels when my Dad was growing up. My Mom accepted it for a while with my Dad as well. I just know I can't do it. My heart is not here for that kind of abuse. I'd rather a man leave me. That would hurt but not half as much as finding out he's having an affair would.
My Grandmother's era is one that did not divorce. That just wasn't acceptable. It's just not what people did. If you were married, you worked it out or turned the other cheek. Women in my age group are not as forgiving. I couldn't fathom cheating on my future husband. It's just not in me. I'm not that girl. I have my own morals and rules and regulations. Cheating is never ok for me. That's just my bottom line. If you know me, you know this. It's just who I am.
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