Wednesday, April 03, 2013

April Showers Bring Random Thoughts

°It's only April and this year has already been so many awful things. I am praying that things turn around in this second quarter of 2013. I need it to. I cannot go through another day like the last few months. I crave deep change in my life. 

° Why is it so easy for some people to cut others off & simply walk away? When and if I walk away from someone, I have good reason and they know. I have never understood those who are able to turn their feelings on and off like a switch. I'm not wired that way. When I let people in, they're usually in for life. I love hard and that can be a curse. 

° A "friend" suggested that I go out more and meet people. Ugh. The problem with that is twofold: (1) I do not like going out much these days. I've done that. (2) I don't want to meet anyone. I don't like most people and I def don't have the patience for new people in my life right now. I'm more than ok with being anti-social for the duration. Either love me or leave me alone. 

° I've decided to stop blogging daily. I think I can do once or twice a week. That's all I can handle right now. I just need a break. Or something. 

° I had these dreams and this plan. Now, they all seem to be just out of reach. So, what do I do? Dream new dreams, make new plans. I am lost as to how I move forward when I can't let go of them. For the first time in years, I have no clue as to what the next step is. That scares me. 

° "Scandal" has progressively gotten better and better. It's the one show I do not miss. There are other shows that I normally watch that I have no clue as to what is going on currently. I cannot focus on much these days. 

° I would love for Spring to stop playing hide and seek with me. I need it to be sunny and breezy here. The weather affects my mood. I need Spring days and warm nights. I need days filled with crawfish and daiquiris. I wanna sit outside and enjoy the nice weather. Spring, get it together!!

° There is a video that literally made me sick this week. What is the purpose? This man beat his daughters because he caught them filming a "twerk" video for Facebook. What was the purpose of beating them and filming it? In this day and age, that is abuse. He could be looking at charges for this. I am not a fan of corporal punishment for kids. I did not enjoy getting whooped as a kid. But, I never endured anything like this. This is just wrong.

°  I am a basketball fan. I saw something that turned my stomach this weekend. Louisville player Kevin Ware suffered a horrible injury. He was rushed to surgery and has been released. I hope that he heals quickly. 

° It's April and National Poetry Month. The poet in me lives for this. There is a new poetry writing program that I've gotten into. It's a month long poetry writing challenge. We are on day/poem #3. I am excited to see what I can come up with this month.

° I finally got around to watching the 6th season premiere of "The Game." I was not looking forward to it for many reasons, mainly because of Tia (Melanie) & Pooch (Derwin) leaving the show. The newcomers Blue and Lauren London (can't remember her character's name). Blue is great eye candy  and he is a decent actor. Loved seeing Malik, Tasha, Jason and Chardonnay. Lauren is a pretty girl but an awful actress. She does nothing for me. The premiere was just ok. I was not a fan of the way they wrapped up Mel and Derwin's storyline. I doubt if I will be tuning in for more. The ratings are way down from the last two seasons. I blame BET and Debra Lee for killing one of my favorite shows. 

° I've been too self conscious all year. I hate it. Hate that I've let someone else's actions shake me. I've second guessed myself so many times in the last few months that it's insane.

° If you have not gotten into Justin Timberlake's "The 20/20 Experience," I do not know what is wrong with you. It is GREAT feel good, vibe with me music. I cannot stop listening to it. Justin was worth the almost 7 year wait. Thank you JT and Tim!!

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