Thursday, January 30, 2014

I Choose Me

I started the year with a distinct promise to myself. This year would be about becoming a better version of myself. I knew that this would take a bunch of little steps to fulfill the bigger promise. Things like my gratitude jar, which I love. I write down one good thing at the end of the night. It makes me smile when writing it. Also, I decided to be happy or at least act happy. I've spent entirely too much time last year being unhappy because of the actions of other people. Every day I wake up with that thought "Be Happy." It is absolutely true what Gretchen Rubin writes in "The Happiness Project," Look for happiness under your own roof” & “Happiness is the meaning and purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.”  

Things that would normally bother me, don't anymore. I have truly given myself over to this new way of thinking and being. I can no longer carry unhappiness around with me like an accessory. Bad things happen. More often than not, to good people. But, for as long as I am on this Earth, I have the chance to change my circumstances. I messed up before. I put the keys to my happiness in the hands of another. That was the wrong move. Because it gave that person the power to break me and they did. I became a woman I didn't know last year. I was angry and hurt and upset and sullen. I do not have time for that woman anymore. She no longer exists. 

Thinking happy thoughts has truly changed my outlook. I'm not saying that I won't stumble because I will. I had a day this week where I could not muster a happy thought. So, I allowed myself to feel what I was feeling. I gave myself the day and then I was over it. I am fully aware of everything in my life. I know the good and bad. I do not sugarcoat anything. I think that there has to be more in store for me, for my life. I'm more determined than every to find out what it is. My happy thought for today is a simple one: "the weather is warming up, I'm out of the house and life is good. I am thankful for today." For me, these are the thoughts that get me through my day. What more can I ask for? Happiness, is indeed, a choice. I choose to be happy everyday. So should you. 

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