Friday, September 12, 2014

That's Seaux Random!

  • My Saints lost their season opener. I am super sad about it. Especially since we lost to the freaking Falcons. I HATE the Falcons. They are our division rivals. Oh well, still a Saints fan, still yelling "Who Dat!"
  • While food shopping in Sam's this weekend, I ran into my hs/college ex's Mom & Grandfather. This woman hated me the entire time I was dating her son. I haven't seen her in years. She hugged me & I was so shocked. She was actually happy to see me. We had a conversation. She told me that she missed seeing and talking to me. And, that she didn't know I was back here. It was odd but interesting. It was the weekend of random encounters. There is another one below. 
  • I randomly met this man Saturday. He was looking for my apartment manager. He told me his whole life story in a matter 10 minutes. Told me that I have a nice aura and that I was beautiful. It caught me off guard but it made me smile. It wasn't a situation where he was trying to get at me but just an honest exchange between two folks. 
  • I had a really good weekend. Slept like a baby. Spent time with my family. Reconnected with some friends. Just a really good few days and I am appreciative of it.
  • I think the above took place because I did something I've known for months that I should have. It's not always easy to do the thing that must be done. But, I have to look out for my well being because there is no one else who will do it for me. Loving myself more and more every day. It's my life and I'm gonna live it for me and me alone. 
  • My legs got the tan they've needed all year while laying out by the pool early Saturday morning. I love it when the color of my legs matches the rest of me. It doesn't happen nearly enough. I had to take photos to remember this lol.
  • I am taking this online modern poetry class. It started yesterday. This first assignment is about Emily Dickinson & Walt Whitman, two of my favorite poets. The class is ten weeks. I cannot wait to see what I will learn from it. 
  • Two different people told me that I seem sad and that I don't seem happy. To a point, they were both correct. It's been a very long 20 months for me. I don't feel the overwhelming hurt and pain and sadness that I once did. I also do not feel like there is a dark cloud over me anymore. Am I 100% better? No. And, I honestly don't think I'll ever be. I loved someone deeply and I was hurt just as deeply. That changes you. It changed me in ways I can't even begin to explain. But, I'm better. I still haven't learned how not to cry over it. I'm working on that. But, I'm on my way back to me. That's all I could pray for at this point. I'm taking care of me first, last and always. 
  • The fact that Michael Brown's killer Darren Wilson has not been seen or heard from in a month is ridiculous. The fact that he hasn't been charged or arrested is in-damn-sane. There is no justice here if you're Black. This country has no use for us. We seem to be disposable. It makes me sick.
  • I have been severely neglecting my blog :( I feel bad about it but the words in my head are ones I don't want to write out or share with the world. They are better left unwritten. I am trying to motivate myself to write more and be better about the upkeep here. I'm trying my best. I promise to be a better blogger, writer, woman. 

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