Questions & Answers You Might Not Hear Everyday

A. If you could get away with one murder in your lifetime without any legal, social, or emotional repercussions, would you kill someone? No, I'm not that heartless. I couldn't take a life just because.

B. What is your first thought when you receive a message on Tumblr, are you excited for the idea of someone from potentially the other side of the world wanting to talk to you or fearful that someone will criticize you? Excited...because I know that 95% of the time, it's my Love.

C. Have you ever looked down on someone because you thought your religious views were superior? No. That would've be counterproductive to what my God wants.

D. Would you rather know everything the universe has to offer but in exchange lose all emotions or remain the way you are now? Remain the way I am now. I'm one with my emotions. I need them.

E. If you could live and be healthy without sleeping or eating/drinking, which would you cut out of your life? Sleeping. It's overrated.

F. If you could take on the exact body and form of anyone else on Earth, who would it be? There is this dancer but I can't remember her name. Her shape is ridic though.

G. Would you rather burn or freeze to death? Freeze.

H. If it meant it would solve all world hunger, war, disease and bigotry, would you spend the rest of eternity in Hell? Nope. I'm not that selfless yet. I know it would be for the greater good. But, we're talking about my life here.

I. Was the first crush in your life something you had or something someone had on you? He had one me. Kindergarten. His name was Eric & I did not return the affection. He teased me recent less. Called me Kenda Calendar ugh.

J. Could you live without having sex ever (again) in exchange for eternal youth? Hell. No. Why would I?

K. Have you ever watched a full length pornographic movie? Yep. Multiple ones.

L. The Beatles or The Rolling Stones? The Beatles.

M. If you could have the ability to manipulate matter or energy, which would you choose? Matter.

N. What was the worst nightmare you ever had? It was awful. It involved a violent, bloody murder scene.

O. Would you rather spend one year with your one true love just to never see them again or the rest of your life with second best? One year with my true love. Settling for second best is never an option.

P. All the sequels/remakes/adaptations/rip-offs in movies nowadays, good or bad? More bad than good. I'm over it. Would rather originality.

Q. Would you rather be dirt poor and emotionally fulfilled in life or be rich beyond imagination and emotionally dissatisfied for life? Poor & fulfilled. I'd at least be happy.

R. Do you have any (secret) feelings of bigotry to any group of people? I don't think bigger try is the right word.

S. Would you rather be the only person in the world that can read minds or have everyone else in the world be able to read minds except for your own? Only girl in the world with that ability.

T. If everyone in the world would automatically only know one language, which language would you choose? French because it's such a beautiful language.

U. If you were old enough and not in a situation where it would be inappropriate, would you sleep with one of your (past) school teachers/professors? Yes. Mr. Hernandez.

V. A world without religion, good, bad, neutral? Bad. Terrible. Awful.

W. The men's rights movement, legitimate cause or laughable, and why? Laughable and ridiculous. The one group of people who have never been disenfranchised or under represented has been men, especially White men. There is no real movement.

X. You can eliminate one of your five senses to substantially strengthen the others, which one and would you do it? I wouldn't do it. But if I had to chose, I'm going with the sense of smell.

Y. Do looks mean anything to you? Don't lie, could you fall in love with someone you thought was ugly? Looks mean something to everyone. Those who say otherwise are lying through their teeth. I couldn't fall in love with someone I wasn't attracted to.

Z. Can you understand the mindset and logic used by the opposite spiritual opinion? An atheist understanding the belief in a higher power and vice versa. I cannot. I'm perplexed by it. If you do not believe in God, what is this higher being you speak of? That's crazy to me.

#30in30: Do You Realize?

...that they are genetically modifying our food??Genetically modified food. Those three words frightened me. The picture above is of a normal sized salmon and a genetically modified one. The difference is ridiculous. I am scared about this practice. They say that this practice will help feed the ever growing world's population. I cannot say that I truly believe that. I'm worried about anything that deals with genetics being changed. That could lead to deformed animals. Those deformities could also be passed on to humans. I do not want to try my luck at anything like that. Who would? It's crazy to me that this practice is legal. That no one is outraged about it. I do not believe that the world is going to run out of food. I just cannot wrap my mind around that idea. I do not believe that we should be altering our food sources.



The long term affects of altering and modifying food has not been confirmed. I am weary of this. What exactly is the USDA feeding us? I have no clue what they are putting into the food. It makes me not want to eat much. After watching a few documentaries, I am completely over most fast food places. I cannot eat McDonald's anymore. I'm not even sure if any of the food they serve is real food. That genetically modified salmon above is gross. I'm staring at it and it's making me ill. They are pumping all kinds of things to alter our food. I do not like what I've been reading about this. I actually had to stop reading about it. Did you guys know about this? How is this legal? Pay attention to the stickers on fruit and labels on meat. The USDA has to label food accordingly. Look into this. I am still in shock. And, not hungry at all.

#30in30: How Time Changes Things

As a little girl, I could not imagine a day when my friends wouldn't be my friends anymore. There was nothing I could fathom back then that would lead to us not being friends today. Maybe I was idealistic and unreasonable. I just knew that those 6 girls would always be my close friends. For many years, I never had to worry about that. Then we became young adults. We graduated from college and life got in the way. I can still pick up the phone and reach out to any one of them. But, we just aren't the close knit group we once were. That's just the way things have played out.
The thing that I've realized is that life has a way of pulling people apart. Literally, almost all of my female friends are married or moms. I am neither. There are things that I cannot relate to on some level with them. Out of state moves have also played a small part in this friendship migration. A change of religion on the part of a friend has caused a divide as well. We are still essentially the same little girls. We still love the same things about each other. It doesn't mean that I don't miss certain aspects of these women. They were my entire world. It wasn't a sudden change in friendship. It happened gradually. One day, I realized how much space was between all of us. I guess that life has a way of giving you what you need in a friend at that time.

I'm always open to meeting new people. Getting to know new people is tiring though. It's also very ironic that my two closest friends also happen to be my first cousins. As my Mom called them, my first friends. I am beyond thankful for Ty & Reese for always being there. As well as my sisters. Friendships are all unique and important in their own way. We, as humans, need them, thrive on them. I am thankful for all the ones I've had in my life. I think I've learned something from each and every friend I've ever encountered. I can only hope that I left the same kind of impression on them as well.

#30in30: This Reader's Review: Part IX "The Alchemist"

For years, I've been meaning to read Paulo Coehlo's "The Alchemist." It's one of those books that people always mention and I always see around. I never took the time out to read it before. I joined an online book club recently. "The Alchemist" was our first choice. I thought this was great because I've been so intrigued by it. I couldn't wait to dive into it. I was pleasantly surprised by what I read. The book is fantastic. And that's putting it lightly. I loved the journey the author took us on.

There are so many lessons within those pages. The one line that is repeated often throughout the book is "When you want something all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." I love the wording and spirit of that line. To me, it means that of you want something bad enough and you work towards it, the universe will work with you. This is what occurred for the main character of "The Alchemist." I highlighted so many passages through this book. It was a quick & easy read. But, there was so much valuable information within the pages.

I learned lessons when the boy thrived and when he failed. I loved the way that hope was never lost. Coehlo did a great job of sliding lessons into every page of his book. I was mesmerized with where the words took me. The main character's perseverance is admirable. He never lost sight of his goals. That is the biggest life lesson in "The Alchemist." If you haven't read this book, I suggest you check it out. It is one of the best books I've ever read.

*My Favorite Quotes

"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure."

"At a certain point in our lives, we lose control of what's happening to us, and our lives become controlled by fate. That's the world's greatest lie."

"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream."

"What happens once will never happen again. But what happens twice will surely happen a third time."

"When each day is the same as the next, it's because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises."

"There is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it's because that desire originated in the soul of the universe.... The soul of the world is nourished by people's happiness ings are coming, they will be a pleasant surprise," said the seer. "If bad things are, and you know in advance, you will suffer greatly before they even occur."

"It is said that the darkest hour of the night comes just before the dawn."

#30in30: What You Don't Know About Me

Blogging allows me the freedom to tell my story in my own words. Since starting the #30in30 challenge, I've read a lot of blogs. One thing I've noticed is a bunch of bloggers have done this getting to know you blogs. It consists of 5 random facts about the blogger. I thought this was an ideal blog topic. I had to dig deep to think of five unique things about me to share. Especially things that I have not shared here before. Here's what I came up with. Enjoy.

1)I am very prissy. Extremely. My Mom has often wondered where I came from because she is nothing like me. I've always been very girly. I own one pair of sneakers. I prefer not to wear them But, I'm also a Hip-Hop loving, sports watching, politics discussing, woman. I am anomaly. I am a walking, talking conundrum. And, to top it off, I am very weird. I say all of that to say that I'm comfortable in my own skin. I love all the idiosyncrasies of me. I think every aspect of these things make me the woman I am.

2) I'm not a fan of candy. I love chocolate. When & if I do eat candy, I always seek out the orange ones. Starburst, Skittles, jelly beans, M&M's, always the orange ones. I do not know why I do this at all. It's just what I do.

3) In general, I hate for folks to touch my feet. I love spa pedicures but I'm always tense when the lady is touching my feet. My nephew Kole loves to rub my feet. It literally makes me cringe. His hands are tiny. I mean, he's only 3. But, it feels so funny. I don't like my feet massaged. Or even just touched. It's one of my quirks.

4) I despise fake hair. I don't dig weaves, wigs, or tracks. It just isn't my thing. I like my hair. I play in my hair too much. Love to feel my scalp. I don't care what others do. I just know that I'm comfortable with my own hair.

5) I have a severe aversion to the color green. I don't buy clothing in any shade of green. Nor cookware, flatware, appliances, shoes, or accessories. I really don't like it. It's my least favorite color ever. I don't know when this started. I just know there is no shade of green that I would ever wear. But, I love sage green on a baby. Weird, right?

Now, I feel like you know me better. These are very random but important aspects of me. I loved reading about the random five things of other bloggers. I have no problem sharing myself here. It's my little place of complete freedom. Now, tell me five random things about yourself, readers. I am more than interested. Let's talk!

#30in30: Ok, I Did It!

One year ago today, I wrote this. Little did I know that it would be the beginning of a year long goal. I have blogged consecutively for one year straight. That is huge for me. I gave myself a goal and I stuck to it. Let me just say that this was not easy at all. There were some nights where I had no clue of what to write about or if I would even be able to do it. I persevered and that is what matters the most. I never could have imagined that when I started this blog with this one post that I would still be here writing my heart out. It's been a little over 2 years since I began blogging. It's been a great experience. I love writing and blogging has helped me to sharpen my skills. This is more of a personal celebration for me. I am thankful for this space.


Writing has always come easy to me. It's been my thing for as long as I can remember. My Mom says I would make up stories about my dolls and my imaginary friend. I've been blessed with the gift of imagination and writing. Writing brings me a sense of calm that I can't really explain. Some people are good with numbers, others with electronics, but I've always had a way with words. I'm thankful for my blog. It's my writing outlet. It's my place to get all these thoughts out into the world wide cyber universe. It's been one long year. I've written when I was happy, excited, mad, hurt, sad and confused. I've written through it all. That's perseverance. This is my reward. Ok, let me get back to blogging and my next writing goal. I plan to finish the year strong. Blogging daily. I have my fingers crossed that I can accomplish this. Thanks to all of you for reading.

“If you do not breathe through writing, if you do not cry out in writing, or sing in writing, then don’t write” —Anais Nin

#30in30: Republicans & the Ridiculous Idea of Rape

“First of all, from what I understand from doctors [pregnancy from rape] is really rare,” Akin told KTVI-TV in an interview posted Sunday. “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”

Akin said that even in the worst-case scenario — when the supposed natural protections against unwanted pregnancy fail — abortion should still not be a legal option for the rape victim.

This is a real statement from a Republican nominee in Missouri. Every time I think that the Republicans cannot come up with anything more ridiculous, they surprise me and do just that. This man opposes the Plan B because he says it is abortion. I guess he doesn't really know what the Plan B pill actually does. It prevents pregnancy. If a woman is pregnant already, the Plan B pill does not get rid of that pregnancy. So, we can all see that Akin is misinformed and happy to be so. The second ridiculous thing he said was that rape victims don't ever get pregnant. He claims that a woman's body shuts down when raped and resists pregnancy. What?? Are you for real? I wonder how outraged rape victims are at this statement. 

Women get raped every day. Some of them end up pregnant. I am more than sure that these victims don't want to be carrying the child of their rapist. And, to imply that is beyond sick. To me, it seems as though the Republicans war on women is in high gear. Akin tried to backtrack on his statements. He hasn't said exactly what he misspoke about though. He should pull out of the race. He should clearly learn more before he speaks. Our President said "The views expressed were offensive. Rape is rape. So what I think these comments do underscore is why we shouldn’t have a bunch of politicians — a majority whom are men — making health care decisions on behalf of women.” I think that sums it up nicely. Republicans take note.

#30in30: Ladies Love Lyrics: Anthony David featuring Algebra & Phonti "4evermore"

I am a fan of Algebra and Anthony David. They are both two severely underrated soul singers. I love the tone of both of their voices. Imagine my surprise to come across this track via Tumblr. This song is a feel good track. A love song with a nice beat. It makes me want to dance. It would work well at a wedding reception. Get into this track.

"4evermore
Forever's a mighty long time
But I really wanna spend it with you
I shine when you shine
And there's really no substitute 4evermore

Take a picture,
I want you to remember
When I professed my love
Press the button,
I hope it's still recording
Every word I'm saying to you

I'm telling you right now
from this day on I've already
weighed up the pros and cons
Melanie, you're just the woman I want, I want, I want

Making my plans just to be with you
Just you and me babe,
till the days are blue
And I ain't ashamed love, to say I do, I do

(Chorus 2xs)

Pick a tree to carve our names
Let the world know it's not a game
Last longer than a wedding ring
Generations tattooed with the love we bring

From the seeds we sow
To the time it takes to grow
Long enough to show you
I won't let go of you

Cause without you
I'm incomplete
Like this love song without this beat
I'm saying that you are the man I need I need, I need

I'm making my plans just to be with you
Just you and me babe,
till the days are blue
And I ain't ashamed love, to say I do, I do..."

#30in30: Movie Review "Sparkle" Shines

"Sparkle" shines in all the ways it should. I cried while watching this movie. Sparkle" was released on Friday. It was Whitney swan song. Our last look into the talent that she possessed. The remake stands completely alone. It takes turns that the original did not. In that way, the writers made this story their own as did the actors. That is what makes it such a good film. The actors do a great job of giving life to the words. I wasn't really looking forward to seeing the movie after Whitney's death. I thought it may have been too soon. But, I changed my mind & went to see if she shined on screen. She did. That made me happy as a fan.

The storyline was engaging. I was interested in where the characters were going. Seeing Whitney on screen was bittersweet. She was so good in her role. I'm sad that she didn't live to see this. My favorite character was Sister, played by Carmen Ejogo. She was amazing to me. I've never seen her work before. But, I will definitely keep my eye out for her future work. Other stand out performances were those of Mike Epps as Satin, Tika Sumpter as Delores and Omari Hardwick as Levi. Jordin Sparks makes her debut in this film. She plays the title role. She is subdued and shy for most of the movie. I liked her as Sparkle. I don't know if this role truly shows her acting ability.



I will not go into details about the movie. I'll just say that I enjoyed it. All of it. The soundtrack to this film is great. I left the theater with one particular song stuck in my head. I was enthralled with every song in the film. That's probably just the avid music lover in me. The music is rightfully paired with the girl group era of the 60's. Even the new tracks sound as if they were straight out if the 60's. If you haven't seen the original, you won't be lost. This film stands alone. The names of the characters are the same. But, there is so many differences between the two. I'm so glad I went to see it. You should check it out as well. I could watch this film again & again. It was that enjoyable to me. Great actors & great writing will always equal a great movie. Whitney would be extremely proud of her work on "Sparkle." I know I am.

#30in30: Stay In My Corner

"Stay in my corner. I won't let us down. I need you around. Hold me close. Never let me go. Stay in my corner." - Keith Washington

The lyrics of that old Keith Washington song resonate with me. That's all many of us want: someone to stay in my corner. How many of us have at least someone who is in our corner? On a bad day, that's all a person needs. One person who always holds us down. If you're lucky, you might have a few of them. That would mean that you are blessed abundantly. It's something no one should ever take for granted.

It can be very hard to let someone, any one in on your dreams, goals and fears. It seemsHaving someone on your side and in your corner can be amazing. It's like your own little cheering section. Having just one person there for you can make the world of difference. I am beyond thankful for my group. They are all unique in their own way..
But, they all encourage me without judging me. They just have my back. That's an incredible feeling. My people have continued to stand in my corner, year in and year old. They stayed faithful to my cause. Thank God for placing such angels on Earth and more importantly, in my corner.

#30in30: Places I Must Visit: New York City

I decided to go domestically with this pick. I'm always choosing other continents for these posts. One place on my list has to be New York City. I've wanted to explore this city for years. I've never had a reason to go. Nor did I ever have anyone to go with. I do not believe that NYC is the type of city one visits alone. I do not think I could live there. I am not interested in taking the subway at all. I just want to walk the streets of the city. Would love to just get lost in the city for a few days. Soak in everything that NYC has to offer me. 

Of course, I want to do all of the tourist things. I want to see the sights. The Statute of Liberty, Times Square, the Empire State Building are among the sights I have to see. I especially want to see what Brooklyn 's like. I want to eat at the most authentic New York spots. Oh, I definitely want to have dollar pizza and Shake Shack. I want to experience the NYC nightlife. SOB's, 40/40, Greenhouse (if it ever reopens) have been mentioned to me. I want to walk through Central Park during the day. I want to walk through Harlem. I want to see Wall Street and see a play on Broadway.

Mainly, I just want take in the hustle that is NYC. I'm sure that it is so different than my city. New York is the Big Apple where everything is fast. While New Orleans is the Big Easy, where everything is laid back and easy. No matter, I need to see it for myself. It's the place in the U.S. I've wanted to visit for as long as I could remember. As a college student, I was planning a trip that my Mom promptedly nixed. She was not having it. Now,that I'm older, I feel like this trip is long overdue. So, soon NYC needs to see me.

#30in30: You Know How Much I Love These

1: When you have a container of Neapolitan ice cream, what flavor do you leave for last? Chocolate, always.
2: Would you rather be caught in a thunderstorm without an umbrella or a snowstorm without boots? Snowstorm. Hate to be caught in the rain unprepared.
3: Let's say you have access to a time machine, but it can only go either backward or forward. One or the other. Which do you choose and where do you go? Backwards...if only to have one last conversation with my Dad.
4: If you could choose to have any superpower ever, what would you pick? I would want to read minds. That would be dope.
5: Tomorrow morning, you wake up in the body of a celebrity, like in a '90s body-swap movie. Who is it? How do they react to your life? What do you do when you're "them"? Would you choose to switch back? Beyonce'. My reaction would be utter ridiculousness. I would want to perform in from of millions. I would switch back after a week or so.
6: Any allergies? Penicillin and shrimps unfortunately.
7: What would you be more embarrassed to buy: sex toys or adult diapers? Adult diapers. Ewww...
8: Did you get enough sleep last night?Surprisingly yes, I did.
9: You're the sole witness to a Mafia murder. Witness protection has to set you up with a whole new life in a totally new country. You have to leave everything behind, but you can pick where you move to. Where do you go? Ok, being in Witsec would suck big, hairy monkey balls for many reasons. But, if I was forced to choose either New York (if I had to stay stateside) or Mykonos, Greece (if I could leave the US).
10: If you could star in a biopic about any famous person ever, who would it be?Oprah. Her life story will play well on the big screen.
11: What's the biggest animal you've ever killed? Bugs count. A spider I guess.
12: Would you rather have millions of dollars but always feel nauseous when you go outside, or be dirt poor forever but never get sick again in your life? I would take the money. Because I could build an awesome estate that I'd never have to leave.
13: A wizard offers you immortality in exchange for your two front teeth. Do you take it? Nope. We are not meant to be immortal.
14: Could you win the Hunger Games? I would fight tooth and nail to win. When surviving is your only choice, nothing else matters.
15: What was your favorite Halloween costume as a kid? How about as a teen/adult?As a kid, I was Rainbow Brite. As a teen, I was Chilli of TLC.
16: Do you bite your nails? Yes. Horrible habit to break too.
17: What was the first movie you remember seeing in the theater? "Annie."
18: Do you prefer music with male or female vocalists? I do not have a preference actually. I prefer that they be vocally talented though.
19: You and the love of your life are having a baby, and you get to choose the name! There's only one catch: your partner INSISTS that it be the name of a place, real or fictional. What do you name your baby? Girl: Kashi; Boy: Kingston.
20: If you could reboot or remake any movie, what would it be and who would you cast? I'm not necessarily a fan of remakes. But, I guess I would pick "School Daze." I would cast Tristan Wilds & Kyla Pratt as leads, Idris Elba as the dean of the school.
21: If you could automatically know how to speak any language or play any instrument, which would you choose? Language Italian; Instrument, the piano.
22: For you, would getting amnesia be a good thing? Negative. That would be so horrible.
23: If you curse loudly and then realize that there are children nearby, what is your reaction? I cringe & apologize.
24: Of what animal are you most afraid? Snakes.
25: Pizza or oral sex? Oral sex followed by pizza.Ha!
26: Without looking them up, can you explain the rules of football? How about Quidditch? What do you think that says about you? I'm sure I can since I am a football fan & an avid Harry Potter fan as well. I think it shows how awesome a woman like me is & that I'm highly versed in a variety of topics.
27: You're in the car, switching channels on the radio when you hear a song that makes you go "OH SHIT, THAT'S MY JAM!" What song is it? Jay-Z "I Just Wanna Love You"
28: Have you ever paid to see a Step Up movie? If not, how much would someone have to pay YOU to see a Step Up movie? Nope. Past the first one, someone would have to pay me at least $50 to watch it.
29: If you were being executed tonight, what would you choose for your last meal? Steak, grilled shrimp, loaded potatoes, Strawberry martini, and for dessert vanilla bean cheesecake with chocolate sauce & fresh strawberries.
30: Have you ever bought an item of clothing because it reminded you of something a fictional character would wear? Yes.
31: If you were invisible for a day, what would you do? Spy on people I know & freak them out by moving things.
32: Have you ever been punched in the face? Nope.
33: How do you take your ramen noodles? I don't because I don't eat that.
34: Do you ever rehearse or plan conversations before you actually have them? When I'm emotional about an issue, I do.
35: How much black do you wear on a regular basis (not counting funerals)? A moderate amount.
36: Do you have any tattoos? Do you want any? Yep & I want more.
37: If someone offered you a free pet snake, would you take it? It's not dangerous or really big or anything. They're just moving to a place that doesn't allow pets. Hell. No.
38: Do you know how to pronounce the word "pinochle"? Sure do.
39: Can you think of anything more boring than birdwatching? Golf and baseball.
40: Are you better with numbers or words? Words. Definitely.
41: At the movies, do you stay for the credits? In general, no. But if I need to know the name of an actor or song, I do.
42: Is morality universal or relative? I believe it is more relative because the whole world does not value the same morals.
43: Let's say you're getting married to someone you absolutely adore. The only catch is that you met them through a Craigslist hookup ad that was supposed to be just for one night of casual sex. Would you tell your friends how you and your fiance met? Not at all. Because our story is ours. I don't have to share that with anyone. All they need to know is that I'm in love & getting married.
44: What's the worst name you've ever been called? A bitch.
45: Would you eat human flesh if it had been harvested and prepared humanely? (Say, from someone brain-dead who had marked him or herself down as an organ donor - same difference, right?) Negative.
46: At what age did you stop believing in Santa? Alternately, if you never believed in Santa, did you ever ruin Santa for anyone else? I do not remember my exact age. But, I know I was young and I caught my Mom wrapping gifts. So, the jig was up. I have never ruined it for anyone.
47: Do you get along better with old people or little kids? Both. But since I have to choose, I'll say little kids.
48: If you had to choose, would you rather become a nun/monk or a drug dealer? A nun. Which would suck majorly. For reasons.
49: What's your best bodily feature, objectively speaking? Since both are equally amazing, I'll say it's a tie between my brain and my breasts.
50: Who is your favorite late night talk show host? I don't have one.

#30in30: Political Notes: Romney Picks Ryan

Romney picked Ryan as his running mate this past weekend. So, now that battle has been set. With the picking of Ryan, Romney solidifies the fact that he is only about the rich population of the U.S. Ryan, like Romney, wants to tax the middle class while giving all the tax breaks to the rich. He also wants to do away with Medicare as we know it. Ryan is just as bad as Romney. The bottom line is if we don't re-elect President Obama, Romney/Ryan will be running this country. Americans can't afford what they are selling. I cannot say a whole lot more about it. But, I will list some things about Ryan below. This is serious business. This election will come down to the very last vote. We should all be watching what's going on. Politics are serious business. It affects all of us. Vote or Romney will be President. I can't let that happen. We cannot allow that to occur.

12 Things You Should Know About Vice Presidential Candidate Paul Ryan by Scott Hoffman

1. Raises taxes on the middle class, cuts them for millionaires.
2. Dramatically increases Medicare costs for seniors, increases eligibility age.
3. Leaves Social Security to the whims of Wall Street.
4. Budget would result in 4.1 million lost jobs in 2 years.
5. Eliminates Pell Grants for more than 1 million students.
6. Embraces extreme individualism (selfishness is “virtue.”)
7. Keeps $40 billion in subsidies for Big Oil.
8. Ryan’s Family stands to benefit from oil subsidies
9. Claimed Romneycare has led to “rationing and benefit cuts.”
10. Believes that Romneycare is “not that dissimilar to Obamacare.”
11. Accused generals of lying about their support for Obama’s military budget.
12. Co-sponsored a personhood amendment.

"All signs point to Paul Ryan being Romney's VP pick. So the man who doesn't care about the poor and likes "firing people" will pick the guy that would end Social Security as we know it. hmmm way to alienate everybody. The poor, the elderly, etc..."

#30in30: Rant: Reality TV Just Got Real

I could have titled this post "When Keep It Real Goes Wrong." It would be totally appropriate. Over the weekend, Chad Ochocinco Johnson was arrested for domestic violence against his wife of 39 days Evelyn Johnson. As a result, Chad was cut from the Miami Dolphins and VH1 has dropped their new reality show. I am not here to write about what did or did not happen between the two. My biggest issue is the way VH1 has responded to the news. A channel that promotes any and all violence on all of their reality shows. What made this particular incident so bad that they had to pull a show? I wonder who made the call. Reality tv has become a huge business. It's come a long way since the first season of MTV's "The Real World." And, sadly, most of the changes in reality tv hasn't been too good.

Granted, I totally get the seriousness of the Evelyn and Chad drama. But, VH1 is the same company that allows "Basketball Wives" to air? Evelyn is the same woman we've seen season after season promote violence on this show. Just last season, she threw 2 wine bottles at her co-star. Also, we saw her run across a table to attempt to attack someone. The woman is a hot head with a violent temper. But, VH1 and Viacom felt no need to pull this show. They promoted it. Praised it to a fault. This company stood idly behind Evelyn and her violent acts for ratings. Why is this violence ok? I do not know what happened between the Johnsons. What I do know is what VH1 has shown us. I stopped watching BBW a while back because the drama wasn't entertaining anymore. It stopped being entertaining when I realized that these were grown women acting like immature school girls on my tv. 

I cannot be ok with VH1 standing behind Evelyn when she was violent for ratings but dropping her show now. Why wasn't she dismissed from BBW? It was all good and fun when she was attacking other women. We've watched her go from throwing drinks in another woman's face (which by the way, I've never seen this happen in real life) to throwing bottles at another woman. Evelyn is more bark than bite. A woman with a big mouth and propensity to throw everything but hands. I blame VH1, Viacom, Shaunie O'Neal and even myself to a extent. I watched this trashy reality tv show before. I helped with ratings. I did that. But, when you know better, you should do better. I tuned out. While I am glad that there seems to finally be consequences for her actions, I am disappointed that it took something this severe for people to see. VH1 should be ashamed of themselves. They have promoted violence on all of their reality shows. It's glorified all in the commercials because that's what pulls people in. I would hope that this makes VH1 take a deeper look at their shows. Changes need to be made. The people on reality tv shows need to be held accountable for their actions. That is the reality I am talking about.

#30in30: It's My Hair: Product Review

It's that time again. It's my hair and I need to talk about it some more. As of this week, I have been transitioning for 45 weeks. I've invested my time in YouTube videos, natural hair care forums and advice from other natural women I know. For the most part, I've had really good look with products working for me & my hair. I haven't had a lot of trial and error. Which is pretty great because I haven't wasted a lot of money. I did not big chop because I was not comfortable with my hair being really short or nonexistent. I entered a contest on a whim via Tumblr & Facebook. I was behind surprised when I actually won. The prize was a Carol's Daughter 1-2-3 Transitioning Kit. I was very interesting to try the products out. A few days after receiving my prize from Sassy Nation, I put them to work. The picture below is where my hair started.



First off, I loved this kit! Absolutely loved the effect it had on my hair. I am not a fan of the smell. I'm not sure what the exact scent is. But, it's not one I'm fond of. The low poo cleanser is great. You don't need to use a lot to feel it working. All three products have this tingling aspect to them that I love. I wet my hair before applying. I worked it into my scalp and from the roots to the tip. While washing my hair, I could feel a major difference. My hair wasn't tangled. It was easier to detangle while using this product, which is a major plus. The second step was my favorite. It's the spray that goes directly onto your scalp. It was tingling the whole 15 minutes it was on my scalp. After rinsing it out, I applied the repair breakage cream. I sat under a hooded dryer for 15 minutes. The heat plus the tingling was an experience. The picture below is halfway through. I used parts 1 & 2 so far.



After I was finally done, I was very satisfied with this product. My hair was soft and manageable. It took me less time to do my hair. I didn't have to spend time detangling. I used my hands instead of a wide toothed comb. I am completely sold on this kit. Even though I am getting towards the end of my transition, I am glad I found this product. I would recommend it to anyone who is thinking about transitioning as well. My natural hair goal was to transition for a year. October 2, 2012 will be my one year anniversary. I'm so proud of myself for sticking to it. Carol's Daughter has given me a product that should make the next few weeks a breeze.
The last picture is what my hair looks like now. It's so soft and I love the way it feels. I suggest all you transitioning naturalistas get into these products.

#30in30: I Remember That Song

"Cash Money Records. Taking over for the 99 and the 2000." - Juvenile





Those words above are the beginning of everything good in my memory from that time. I was a Cash Money fanatic. The only other artist who was getting any play in my room was Jay-Z. But, Cash Money was different to me. They were the home town boys I would see all the time. And, they were making great music that I was digging. As I sat down to brainstorm on a topic for the twelfth day of this 30in30 challenge, I played an oldie but goodie. The Cash Money play list was just the inspiration that I needed. Back when Lil Wayne had more skin visible than tattoos. Back when Ms. Cita didn't allow Wayne to curse. Or back when Turk or B.G. weren't doing time behind those walls. Back when Manny Fresh was the in house beat maker. Back when the Hot Boys were the ish. This is the Cash Money I miss. Not for nothing, I have no issue with Drake, some Nicki tracks. But, I really want that old Cash Money feel back.







I remember going to a Cash Money concert for $5 at this club Grant Street in Lafayette, Louisiana. My girls & I got our tickets early in the afternoon. We were early to the concert that night as well. Grant St. wasn't a big club nor was it fancy. I am sure that we all had on tank tops and shorts and Reebok Classics (or Souljas as we New Orleanians called them). We weren't dressed up at all. We held up our weekly spot, on the left side of the stage by the speakers. We sat on the speakers vibing to the dj until the concert started. My girls & I were drinking our usual, whiskey sours. The Cash Money crew came on stage with little to no fan fare. You have to remember that this was just before the Universal deal. These guys were very humble back then. B.G. literally sat next to me rapping his verses & talking to us. The concert was great. They did all of our favorite tracks, old and new. We shook hands and exchanged hugs with Juvie, B.G., Turk, Wayne, & Manny. They were happy as hell just performing their music. This was the early days before they were seeing big money. To this day, it is still one of the most memorable concerts I've ever attended.







I miss that era of Cash Money music. The early days it was like they only belonged to us. So, I played the first Hot Boys cd in its entirety last night. It is filled with so many memories. Every song brings me back to college. Back to room 207 in Bancroft Hall my freshmen year. I still feel the exact same way when I hear a song from that era. The music was quintessential New Orleans, Everything about it felt like home. The beats always reminds me of the block parties in P-town. The lyrics are a direct result of growing up here. Somewhere on the journey, Cash Money lost that sound, that feeling. I know that things have to change. I get it. It doesn't mean that I can't miss it and yearn for it back. That's the thing about music. It can evoke the tiniest memory from one simple note. This is what my Saturday night turned into. A walk down memory lane with the Hot Boys and Big Tymers supplying the soundtrack. So, I grabbed a glass of Pinot Grigio while rapping along to every word. Cash Money Records old tracks still hold true today. Enjoy the music.

#30in30: Take This Pregnancy Test Or Else

I can distinctly remember 4 girls who were pregnant while I was in high school. I was shocked by only one of them. She was like me, a good girl in honors classes who never got in trouble. The other 3 girls I was not surprised by at all since they all had "reputations." I graduated from high school 15 years ago. (Wow, I'm getting old) Teen pregnancy has been an issue for decades. Politicians and teachers alike have lobbied for abstinence programs. The reality is that kids are having sex. They are not abstaining. Imagine my surprise to read about a Louisiana charter school that for the last 6 years has had a pregnancy policy. This policy states that any girl that a teacher or administrative suspects of being pregnant is forced to take a pregnancy test. If the student refuses to take the test or has a positive test, she is expelled from school. If she keeps her baby, she can not return to school. But, if she terminates the pregnancy, she is allowed to return. This policy makes no mention of the father. How is this fair? And, more so, what does this solve?

I am astonished that this policy has been allowed to exist for so long. Who in their right mind thought that this was a good idea? In high school, I know that I would have been very offended by a teacher asking me to take a pregnancy test. It's an invasion of privacy and it is humiliating at best. If I was a parent, I would be raising hell over this policy. It is unethical on so many levels. I wonder what this solves for the admins. Will it stop teens from having sex or will it stop girls from getting pregnant? Throwing the girls out of school clearly does not solve any problem. The girls not being in school just leaves a huge purple elephant in the room. I know when I was in high school when a person was in trouble and not in school, we had more to talk about. That's the way high schoolers operate. It's all we know in that space. 

The part that really gets me is the fact that the father of the baby has no repercussions. He is absolved of all wrong doing. Why is it ok for the father to remain at his school when the mother has to leave? And, this school is also pushing the appeal of an abortion on a teen mom. "If the pregnancy is terminated, the student can return." I get it, the school admins are pro-life. That is their choice. They do not have the right to push their agendas on possibly scared pregnant teens. None of this seems politically, morally, or ethically correct to me. Why did it take 6 years for people and parents to be outraged about this? My Mom would have caused major hell if this happened to me. My Mom has always been my biggest supporter. She's always had my back on every subject. I wonder where the mothers of these girls are and why aren't they doing something about it.

After the outrage reached national levels, the New Delhi Charter School came under much needed scrutiny. I've read that the policy has been banned as a result of a Change.org petition. The sad thing is the policy may be out but the hearts of the people involved have not changed. I am positive that pregnant teens will still not be accepted at this school. They will continue to be mistreated. They will never be seen in the same light as the non-pregnant students. Teen pregnancy isn't an ideal thing. But, it doesn't have to be a death sentence. I think the real tragedy is the fact that we aren't educating our teens about safe sex. The students who abstain do it because they want to. No information I received in high school about abstaining helped me make a choice. I did not have sex in high school for one HUGE reason. One of my older best friends got pregnant @ 15. That was all I needed to see. That did more for me than anything anyone told me. Her situation became my reality. I knew I didn't want a baby when I was a baby. This situation is insane. We cannot hide the problems of the world away. So, we shouldn't shun or hide teen pregnancy. It's a problem that we need to fix. But, the New Delhi Charter School's policy is not the way. We need a better resolution.

#30in30: Get Into It: Elle Varner "Perfectly Imperfect"

For the last few years, R&B has been on a downward spiral. The infusion of Hip-Hop into R&B has become common place. I do not dislike that aspect. Some times, it can be really good. However, this euro-dance pop infusion is not my cup of tea. I dislike everything about it. I have been yearning for the days of early 90's R&B to come back. There are a few artists who are on the right track. In comes Elle Varner. A new voice that I cannot get enough of. Her debut "Perfectly Imperfect" was released this week. It was everything that I wanted it to be. Sans the J. Cole feature, the cd is pure R&B. 

Elle's strong point is her storytelling ability. All of her songs have that aspects to them. It's something that a lot of artists cannot/do not do. Storytelling in a song is nothing new but it is a lost art. My new favorite song has to be "Sound Proof Room." I love everything about this song. My favorite line has to be from the chorus. "Baby, you should know if I ever get you alone, me & you, me & you, boy we're gonna need a sound proof room. Oh boy we're gonna make a lot of noise." Everything about this song does it for me. I can listen to the cd from beginning to end. It's 11 songs and they are almost perfect. There is one song that I'm not too fond of. But, I still love it. Her first two singles "Only Want To Give It To You" and "Refill" have been on constant rotation since they were released. Tracks like "Stop The Clock," "I Don't Care," "Leaf," and "Not Tonight" are all single worthy. It will be interesting to see what direction her record label goes in.



The cd is full of youthful sounds. It's a really feel good collection. I think this was the perfect follow up to her mixtape "Conversational Lush." I loved her mixtape and feel the same way about her debut. Elle did an awesome job of staying true to the vocal lane she has created. I would love to catch Elle in concert. I have a feeling that she will be quite awesome. If you are looking for a new voice to listen to, go ahead and give Elle Varner a chance. Get into her "Perfectly Imperfect" and "Conversational Lush." Both are well worth a listen. Enjoy!

#30in30: Random Can Be Good

° I am sad because I am on the last book in the Left Behind series. I cannot wait to write my review for you guys. It's been a really long time since I've been so enthralled with a book (or set of books).

° I am beyond over this extreme heat and random rain. But, then again, this is New Orleans. I know that this is what happens here this time of year.

° I am thanking God for growth, maturation, and restraint. I def called on all of that a few weekends ago. Thank you God for bringing me there.

° This #30in30 challenge has been stressful but great. Writing everyday has been a battle that I've been fighting and wining since the beginning of the year. That is not the hard part. I've challenged myself to write differently. I am sharing more and trying to write about different topics. I am thankful for the opportunity to sharpen my tool though.

° It's been 45 weeks since my last relaxer. That is a lifetime to a woman who couldn't remember a time when I didn't have a relaxer. It may not mean anything to anyone else but its everything to a woman like me. Yay ME!! This was not something I thought I could do and stick with. I'm so glad that I have. It's been a journey and I'm almost to the end of my transition. October 2nd will be my one year anniversary.

° It's football season again! I've missed it so much. Let's see what my boys can do this season.

° I have been playing around with the idea of writing short stories. I haven't done it in a while. I am going to post it here once I do it.

° I also haven't written a poem in forever. That's really a travesty. I've been so blog focused that I've forgotten about the avenue that brought me here. Poetry is the heart of me. I need to do better.

° I realize that I can no longer sustain relationships in my life that aren't equal. I cannot do all the giving or the doing while receiving nothing in return. I'm too old not to know better. Going forward, this is the mantra.

° One of my favorite things to do is listen to HIM sleep. It's silly but it's very calming to me. He does that for me.

° So, I've always had vivid dreams. But waking up sore and/or bruised from them has never been the move. How is it possible for me to hurt myself in a dream & wake up injured in real life? I'm perplexed. *as I stare at this random thigh bruise*

° I find myself sitting with the tv off more often. I've either grown tired of the awful programming selection or my attention has shifted to more productive things. Either way, I'm good :-)

#30in30: Diving Inside My Psyche

In many aspects, I can be completely fearless. I joined the Speech & Debate team in middle school on a whim. Got up and performed oratory, poetry, and prose with no problem. I was an anchor on my middle school's morning tv program. I am not opposed to public speaking. As a matter of fact, I love it. I love to command people's attention when I have to say. I do not need to be the center of attention or the life of the party. That's never been me. But, I also know I can play that role need be. So, why is it that little things freak the hell out of me?

I sing all the time. Mostly when I'm alone. But, ask me to sing in front of you and I freeze. I don't think that it has anything to do with being judged. I'm wise enough to know that on some level I'm being judged every day by any one. I can't sing. I'm no Patti, Beyoncé or Anita. I sound ok. But I also know it isn't my forté. It literally freaks me out to be put on the spot to sing for someone. I know its silly. It's just how I feel. I don't know of something happened to me as a kid that prevents me from being fearless at this.

There was a time when I did everything in my power to hide my breasts. It took a lot of effort on my part. The twins, as I affectionately refer to them, have been huge for a while. People have made them the topic of conversation. It embarrassed me for years. It took me a while to be comfortable with them. Also, I had to realize that I can't hide them. It's ridiculous on so many levels. I was self conscious about them. I blushed when my friends would speak about the twins as if I wasn't standing right there. I had to embrace that I had something God given that women will pay good money for. I had it naturally. The embarrassment died down. My maturity kicked in & I embraced myself. There has not been one moment since then where I've felt self conscious about them.

Even now, I have moments where the doubts of the younger version of me peeks in. I try not to fall back in to old habits. Being fearless is less about doing and more about existing. That is something I'm always working on. I'm not striving for perfection though. I just want to be the best version of me that I can be. I owe that to myself and to those who love me. I don't like when things/people rattle me. I like to be on top of things in all aspects of my life. That's my ultimate goal. I am always analyzing myself so that I can weed out the bad and work harder on the good of me. What can I say? I am a constant work in progress. Stay with me as I work!

#30in30: Friends With Restrictions

Today's topic is inspired by a post on Facebook. The question posed was this: "You are planning your wedding. Your best friend's hair/size/etc. doesn't fit with your ideas for your event. Do you not allow them to participate or do you adjust your vision a bit?" This topic struck a distinct nerve with me. I've been personally affected by this situation. It didn't take me long to recall my feelings on it. I've been in a few weddings and have seen the way they affect those involved. I was completely caught off guard in the situation. Let me tell you what happened to me.

For years, she and I bonded over many things. She would often say "when I get married, you know you're in my bridal party." It was an understanding between the two of us. So, when she became engaged, I just knew I was in the wedding. Imagine my surprise when that turned out not to be the case. Her reason was ridiculous for rescinding the offer. She also didn't even tell me face to face. She left me a message. There comes a moment when you realize who your friends are. The moment my "friend" left that messed up voicemail I knew. It made me realize that we weren't the good friends I thought we were. I was so hurt by her words. From that moment, our friendship was forever broken. We weren't the same two girls anymore.

Weddings seem to bring out an ugly side of people. Looking back on the situation, I realized that the friendship had restrictions. And, they seemed to remove around the size of my chest. That was the reason I was unceremoniously kicked out of the wedding party. It hurt. I held on to that hurt for a while. It made me self conscious about something I could not change or control. It made me sad. This is only my second time telling this story. It doesn't hurt anymore. I learned a lesson. I know what I will and won't do to my family & friends when my day comes. That day will be all about love & family, the family I was born into, the one I am marrying into & the one I handpicked. That's what I want.

#30in30: Defining My Literary Voice

"Do you have a 5, 10 year plan?" he quietly asked. That question used to cripple me. Only because I never knew exactly what the right answer was supposed to be. It's like the "describe yourself in 5 words" question. Such a hard question to fully answer. This time, I had an answer. Because the older I get, the more focused I am becoming. My ultimate goal is to write a novel. That's the easy part, proclaiming my future. The hard part deciding what to write, what particular story to tell. In college, I started working on a novel. I was heavily influenced by the literature that I was taking in. I was all about the urban lit genre. I gobbled it up. I read just about every highly praised street lit book. The story lines were new and exciting to me. Mainly because they were all so foreign to my life. 

I grew up in the hood but I was never a street chick. I was enthralled with that lifestyle in the pages of those books. My first attempt at writing my novel was unauthentic to me. It wasn't my voice or my story to tell. So I destroyed it. I sent all of those words to a fiery death. I didn't want anyone to read them. They were awful. Now, I am more focused on telling a story that speaks of my heart. I know that I want to create great characters who have depth that just happen to be Black. My plot and story have to be awesome. I am leaning more towards a romantic comedy edge. That is what piques my interest. I want people to get so lost in my world that the race of my characters means nothing. I just want to write a beautiful moving piece of work. It's easier said than done. 

Anyone who proclaims to be a writer knows how hard it is to share your art with the world. My words are like my babies. It's hard to give the world your heart because everyone isn't going to love what you do. I have tough skin but my heart is fairly fragile. It's the one thing hindering me. I have decided to just do it. Just go for it. I have to know if I have the literary chops to make it. I feel it deep in my heart that I do. I know once I have my work published, I am opening ng myself up to the criticism of the world. People will have their strong opinions about it. Some will love it, others will hate it. I have to accept that fact. I know I won't be able to satisfy all of the readers with my work. I have to accept that fact. 

Finding and perfecting my literary voice has been a tedious task. I do not want to tell a story that has already been told. I cannot be a carbon copy of the writers I love. It's one of the main reason I love my blog. I get to write my story in my voice here. Writing is a skill that needs to be sharpened. It can only be accomplished by writing in mass quantity with mass quality. I pour my heart out here. I'm hoping that I can translate that passion into my novel. I am putting it out into the universe that I will write that special piece of literary gold. I'm focused on doing the work to achieve that. My mind, heart and literary voice are all in sync. Remember my name and this particular post. I know what my future holds.

#30in30: Picture Perfect

Pictures are one of my favorite hobbies. I love to be able to sit and reminisce while looking at old photos. I have not always been diligent when it came to taking and keeping them though. I wasn't that concerned with them for years. As a kid, I only remember taking school pictures. In high school, I LOVED pictures. This was reinforced by the fact that I was on the newspaper and yearbook staffs. But, I still did not take a lot of pictures just for my personal stash. It was just something to do to insure that my friends and I stayed in the yearbook :) I'm not sure why some are opposed to photos so much. I need them. I snap them all the time. Pictures often times capture more than just the people on the screen. They capture a feeling, a song, a thought of something specific about that moment in time. 

After my Dad died, I realized that I did not have a lot of pictures of him. That made me so angry on top of everything else. There were 18 years of memories that we shared and pictures weren't taken. In a way, I became obsessed with documented things via photos. I still carry a camera in my purse at all times. These days I am partial to the convenience of my Evo's camera. I love pictures. I really do. There are always such good memories attached to them. I can almost remember the exact moment that each was taken. That alone makes it worth it. Memories may fade as we get older and our minds can't recall certain things. But, pictures are forever. They have no expiration date. I should start to date them and put names on the back. I don't want to be 78 and can't remember who's actually in the picture. 

Photos may not be that important to most but they represent something else to me. They are a representation of what I've experienced, where I've been, and whom I've shared them with. As I flip through the countless photo albums I have acquired over the last years, I still get sad about the lack of Daddy pictures. I take an annoying amount of pictures because I don't ever want to not have any pictures. My nieces and nephews are so used to me making them pose that they ask for pictures to be taken. I have a ridiculous amount of pictures of the 8 of them. I make no apologies about this aspect of me. Hey, we're making memories here. I know they will love to see all of the photos that I will have acquired by the time they reach high school. There is just something about having a picture to go along with the perfect story. It just works.

*Above photos: (1) 4 of nephews/niece at our last family reunion; (2) My parents holding a 4 month old me; (3) me at 3 y/o*

#30in30: Ladies Love Lyrics, Special Edition

This edition of "Ladies Love Lyrics" is slightly different. I decided to step out of my r&B/Hip-Hop box for this pick. I do not know anything about the Rascal Flatts. Until I heard this song "Bless The Broken Road," I could not name one song by this group. I discovered this song on a random blog read. This song speaks to me on so many levels. It's a song about all the roads traveled that finally lead you to your one true love. I love everything about it. For me, music is the best when I can identify with it personally.

My favorite lines are "That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you." How dope is that? I know that I can be very biased when it comes to love songs because of where I am in my life. But, to be perfectly honest, I have always had a extremely soft spot for good love songs. "Bless The Broken Road" truly falls into that category for me. I could listen to this song forever. It's that good to me. The Rascal Flatts have a new found fan in me. I will be looking into more of their music. Listen and enjoy!

"I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

[Chorus:]
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

[Chorus]

Now I'm just rollin' home into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you..."

#30in30: The Scenario: Family Feuds

Families are a complex part of life. They are the people who know us the best and love us. But, there are also a faction of family that causes us stress. The fact that they are family complicates things. It is hard to cut family members out of your life. The reality is that some times this is what needs to happen. Family feuds happen. This is just a fact of life. Sometimes, they are small and insignificant. Other times, they are huge, epic, blow outs. Either way, they both affect the entire family. That is never a good thing. I try my best to avoid the familiar drama. It is not my thing. And, the reality is, family stays family.

"The family is a haven in a heartless world. - Christopher Lasch

There are some things that I just cannot stand for. Disrespect is high on that list. I will not stand around and let anyone disrespect me or certain family members. That's just not going to happen. I love my family. I am closer to some of them. Those are the ones I will always have their back. I'm not one for fussing and fighting, especially in public. I don't want to be involved in this. I do not like or live for drama. But, I know that there are some that this is their only joy in life. That is sad but true. There are a handful in my own family. For the most part, I avoid and ignore them. I do my best to not invite that negative energy into my space. I do not want that or them no where near me.

"Families are like fudge - mostly sweet with a few nuts." - Author Unknown

The bottom line is this: keep your disrespectful speak to yourself in my presence. It will not bode well. In this scenario, I may come out of my character when faced with it. I am thankful that I am not the same hot head that I was at 21. In general, I am not looking for a fight. I am a 32 year old woman. What would I look like fighting? That's dumb and that isn't me. I will always stand up for myself. I will defend those I love until there isn't any life left in me. That's who I am. Feuding inside one's family is never a good thing. They divide the family. It never ends well. Love your family. Even when all they want to do is fight. Love them regardless.

#30in30: The Explanaton

Twitter is one of my favorite social media sites because of the way it connects us to others. One of my favorite authors, Aliya S. King, utilizes her Twitter platform. She holds weekly sessions aptly called #AskAliya. She encourages her Twitter followers to ask any and all writing questions. I love how interactive she is with all of us. Last night, she challenged her followers. It's the #30in30 blogging challenge. The goal is to write a blog per day for a month. That is the only rule to the month long challenge. Sounds right up my creative alley. 

Writing has never been hard for me. It's essentially who I am. Writing for the world to see always hinders the process for me. As a writer, sharing your words is literally laying your heart bare for others to see. That takes courage. Writers, in that sense, have to have huge balls. This challenge is about me pushing myself to the next literary level. I write to sharpen my tool. I think a writer cannot get to the quality of their work without going through the quantity. Writing everyday helps hone my skills. I become a better writer by simply writing. My blog is my continuous conversation with the world. I am writing in abundance so that my written work matches all that I read. I'm developing my voice here in this space. 

For me, this won't be a challenge. I have been blogging every day all year. But, I've decided to participate anyway. I want to put a twist on my personal challenge though. I want to blog about different topics. I'm not sure exactly what I will blog about. But, I'm totally in this. It will be great. I also think it will be fun to read some new blogs via others who will be in the #30in30. For the next month, my challenge will be to diversify the scope of my blog. That is what I will focus on. Fingers crossed and prayers sent up for writing growth during this period. August 1st was the start date for the challenge. Now, we're off and rolling. I'm wishing myself good luck. 

#30in30: Food For Thought

Focus means "a central point, as of attraction, attention or activity."

Sometimes this is the hardest thing to do, to focus. To get your mind centered on one specific thing. Life has a way of throwing so much at a person that one could lose focus easily. I know this to be true. Some things I know when it comes to writing, I have to truly get myself to settle down and focus. I have to visualize my topic and my points. I clear my mind of everything and focus on that one topic. All of my thoughts about it cloud my mind. This is easier said than done when it comes writing. My focus gets challenged many nights. There are times when I cannot write a thing. Any there are times when I have trouble focusing on many things. It takes a lot of concentration. My mind is always on overdrive. This is the gift and the curse. It's awesome when I need to brainstorm. Not so awesome when its time to sleep. At that point, I have to make myself focus on sleep. What is your focus right now in life? Where does your passion lie?