Black and Natural

Love is indeed the new Black. It is the thing none of us can get enough of. ("Everybody wanna know what my Achilles' heel is. Love I don't get enough of it." -- Shawn Corey Carter) Last Sunday, Solange Knowles got married and pictures were released via Vogue. Those wedding pictures literally shut everything down. It was the only topic of discussion on Twitter that night. The Knowles-Ferguson wedding did indeed #BreakTheInternet. The pictures were breathtakingly beautiful. What I loved the most was Solange's natural hair in her signature afro for her wedding. As a woman who has been natural for over 3 years now, I am totally biased on this subject. I LOVED it. Solange has been a carefree Black girl for years. She does things her way with no apologies. And, that is a sentiment I can get behind. This is actually the second wedding in the last few weeks were the bride's were natural. The other was Demetria Lucas (aka A Belle in Brooklyn). I loved her look for her wedding as well. I never put much thought into wedding day hair. But, I love this trend. I love seeing women being unapologetically themselves, especially on what is dubbed as one of the most important days in one's life.

What I find deplorable is the backlash on social media. I am so glad that I do not follow any of these idiots who thought Solange's hair was ugly or nappy or looked bad. It did not take me long to find the clusters of idiot who had that frame of mind. This was a woman who married her love. It was her wedding day and she did it her way. She, also, slayed effortlessly in every single photo I saw. The sad part is those negative thoughts came from other Black people, mainly Black women. I'm sad to say I wasn't even shocked. The hair that grows naturally out of your head is not bad or wrong or ugly. It's God's work. I was offended on so many levels. This article was written by a Black woman. Why is natural hair such a taboo topic? Why do you care how a woman wears her hair? Her hair, her day, her choice. And, I , for one, am a fan.  Natural hair is not a movement, it's a way of life. Go ahead and accept it. Get into it. 

It's My Hair: 3 Years & Counting!

This past week I reached a major milestone. I've been natural for 3 years now. It's been three long years since I last had a relaxer. I am more than amazed with myself. My hair has grown so much in the last year. In the beginning, there were detractors, people who didn't support my journey. I persevered. I made a choice for me and any future daughter I would have. I wanted to know what my hair felt like in its natural state. I wanted to see if I could wean myself off of my dependency to relaxers. I was able to do all of that. I won. For the last three years, I've been winning. My natural hair journey has been exciting for me. I've learned so much about my personal skill set and my very kinky, very coily natural hair. I am so proud of myself for conquering this huge deal. My hair has grown to bra strap length. I am aiming for waist length hair in the next year or two. Once I reach that level, I do not know what I will do. I've included my favorite hair shots from this year. There have been so many different styles. I like diversity and change. My natural hair works for me. 

I dyed my hair this year. It's been 4 years since I last did this. I am loving my new color. My hair is so healthy and thick and long. I am not used to keeping my hair long. In my former life, I was a scissor happy hair person. But, I decided to see how long I could go without cutting my hair. So far, so good. In the next year, I am just focused on width as well as length in regards to my hair. I want it to stay healthy and keep it's thickness. My hair is truly an extension of me. It's my statement to the world. I love that I've stuck to my natural journey. I know that my vitamin intake has helped with my growth. I have only straighten my hair twice this year. I prefer my hair in its kinky, curly natural state. I am happy with my hair developments. Cannot wait to see what comes next. Healthy hair makes for a happy Kenda. Happy 3rd anniversary to me!!

It's My Hair: Dye Job

I love color. Always have. Dying my hair has been my thing since I was 14. But, I haven't dyed my hair in four years. FOUR! So, to say I was apprehensive is an understatement. I got some great advice from my dope friend Reese. I purchased L'Oreal Technique Excellence HiColor (Browns For Dark Hair Only) in Light Auburn. I got three boxes because I have thick, coarse hair. I also picked up one bottle of L'Oreal 30 Oreo Developer. I parted my hair into four sections. I mixed them in a plastic applicator bottle. I then applied it to my hair starting at the back left fourth. It took a while to apply all of the dye to my entire head. I did not let it sit for long. I rinsed it out with warm water. Then I shampooed and conditioned my hair. Below are my results which I am now ecstatic about. I wasn't that happy about it the day after. But, this weekend, a braidout made me realize how deep my new shade was. In the pics, my hair looks purple but it really isn't. I know that next time, I will leave the dye on longer to get a lighter shade. I am happy with my results. Happy Kenda is happy. Get into my color, honey!

Before:

After:

It's My Hair: Length Check

This is what boredom looks like in my world. Today, I wanted to see how long my hair was. I know how thick it is because I deal with it everyday. But, I hardly ever use heat on my hair anymore. This is only the second time I've flat ironed my hair in the last year or so. All week my hair has been in in a bantu knot out. I keep it well oiled and moisturized daily. So, today I didn't have to do much. I started by hand combing my hair in sections. I then sprayed my hair with Garnier Fructis Sleek and Shine Flat Iron Perfector Straightening Mist. It's a heat protectant and I love it. It works wonders and it smells like heaven. I only used my flat iron on a medium heat and went to work.

Finally after an hour and 15 minutes, I was done. I could not have been happier with my results. My hair was straight and shiny. Next up was checking my length. My hair has grown so much since last year. I did not realize how much until today. I'm almost at BSL (bra strap length) and that makes me happy. I have never been big on hair length. I prefer width because big hair is dope and I love it. I couldn't stop running my fingers through my head. Of course, I had to throw on my new favorite gold double braided headband and a little makeup and take pictures. I'm overly excited about my hair journey and my hair growth. I doubt that I'll flat iron my hair again this year but it was good to see my progress. Yay for happy, healthy long natural hair. 

It's My Hair: Comparisons

 The top pic is from September 2011. I had gotten my last relaxer in July of that year. I was testing a theory at first. I wanted to see how long I could go between relaxers. This was how I started my natural hair journey. The bottom pic is from last month. It's the first time I straighten my natural hair in at least a year. I didn't realize how different my hair was until I saw these two pictures. I will say that my hair was healthy in both. But, clearly it is thicker, fuller in the natural pic. I could not have asked for anything better. I did not have unrealistic expectations going into this. I knew my natural hair would not be like Tracee Ellis Ross. I would not have those loose curls. I just wanted to know what my hair felt like without a relaxer in it. I was scared in the beginning. My only thought was that if it didn't work out in my favor I could always get another relaxer. I haven't had that thought in years now. I love my hair. I was already camera happy. I take way more pictures of my hair now. 

One of the main reasons I decide to return to my natural state is one I haven't said out loud too much. I was in a place mentally and emotionally that I was preparing for my future as a Mom. I did not want to pass on the tradition of thinking the hair that grows out of your head was bad or unmanageable. This is the silent tradition that had been passed down generation after generation. I did not want my future daughters to have bad feelings about their hair. So, I wanted to learn everything I could about my hair in its natural state to pass on to them. Now, I may not get to make that dream come true because I haven't had any children. But, this was an important lesson and journey for myself. I have a few cousins who have returned to their natural states because of me. That makes me feel incredible. I can truly say I love my hair even on the days that my twist out's aren't completely dry or my bantu knots didn't curl the way I wanted them to. It's my hair and my journey and I am so glad that I did this. 

It's My Hair: Straight Hair Don't Care

I've been a very good naturalista for the last few months. I've spent more time on my hair. I deep conditioned often. I gave myself hot oil treatments and clipped my ends regularly. I avoided heat like a former friend who did me wrong. I've had a lot of fun playing with my hair. I am still very partial to a braid out or a bantu knot out. I combat "bad hair days" (aka days when my hair didn't dry all the way or the style didn't come out quite right) with buns. And, then came the day that I got bored with my hair. So, I did something I haven't done in over 6 months. I decided to flat iron my hair. *gasp* I know I was shocked too. This was an adventure to say the least. 

I started by rubbing my whipped shea butter mix throughout my hair. My homemade shea butter mix is shea butter, grapeseed oil, a little vitamin e oil, and glycerin. It is my favorite thing to use in my hair. Then I sprayed my hair with Fructis Flat Iron Heat Protector. I proceeded to spend the next almost 2 hours straightening my kinky, coily tresses. When it was finally straight, I couldn't believe how long it was. I haven't truly seen the length of my hair in at least a year. I also clipped my ends. I then decided to take it one step further and curled my hair. I wanted a full, bouncy look. That is exactly what I ended up with. My hair was so thick and pretty once I was done. I was more than satisfied with my results. It's been two days and I still cannot stop touching my hair. I have been pin-curling it at night to keep my roots straight and my ends curled. I am not sure how long I will keep it this way but I really like it. I probably won't use heat on my hair until the end of the year. This luxurious look is a winner. Get into my tresses, people!! 

Guess Who Is The "Naturally Fierce" Feature?

I was so excited to see my face on the Global Couture IG feed as the "Naturally Fierce" Feature!!! I loved it. The above pic is one of my faves. Loved my braid out, my natural hair. Also, my makeup and eyebrows were on point if I do say so myself. I was extremely happy that day. You can read my feature on Global Couture. I love Patricia's site because it is geared toward natural hair. I love the info I learn there. Get into it. Oh, there is one mistake on it. I received my first relaxer at the age of 8 when I was in the 4th grade. The age was omitted. Anyway, it's a great read about my natural hair journey. Please check it out!!

It's My Hair: Experimentation

I LOVE my hair. I really love it. This is something that being on this natural hair journey has given m e: hair confidence. I love the versatility of my own God-given hair. I am in love with it. Even on the days that my twist outs aren't completely dry and the style I tried doesn't quite turn out the way I felt it should, I still love it. I have been very experimental with my hair this year. More bantu knot outs, wash and go's and pinup's. My hair amazes me daily. I am learning that my hair demands a lot of moisture because it is so thick. I use the LOC (liquid, oil & cream) method when I do my hair, emphasizes on the oil part. I have stopped cowashing or prepooing my hair every week. Now, I do it every two weeks or so since I am fully natural now. It takes so long to air dry. I try to avoid using heat on my hair at all costs. This means I will usually wash my hair on a Friday or Saturday night so that it has the weekend to dry completely. This is the only method that works for me. 

I've learned that less is more with hair products. Also, things I can make in my own kitchen are always a great thing. I think I am going to avoid straighten my hair all year if I can. I have no real need for it. I do need to get my ends trimmed soon though. I haven't set foot in a salon in over 3 years. That is huge for someone who lived and died by them. I don't miss it. Have I mastered all there is to know about natural hair? Not hardly. Am I a pro at all natural hair styles? No way. What I am doing is having fun with my own hair. Good or bad, right or wrong, I am learning what works for me and my natural hair. It's an interesting journey to be on. I love it though. It's my hair and I am conquering it. Just wanted to check in with my fellow naturalistas. Hope everyone is loving their hair as much as I am. Enjoy your God-given hair, ladies!!

Natural Doesn't Mean Militant

Why is it that a Black woman wearing her hair in its natural state is a shock or a political statement? Who decided this? The natural hair of any Black woman is not a fad or a movement or a political stance. It is just simply her hair. Our hair is glorious. The only statement we are making is that we love our hair in its natural state. My statement today about my hair may be drastically different tomorrow. That is the great thing about our natural hair: it has great versatility. There is nothing militant about it. 

I am NOT my hair. Neither is any other Black woman who wears their hair in its natural state. Other women of different nationalities don't have to deal with this. Their hair is culturally and widely accepted as the norm. So, that automatically makes the hair of Black women "unacceptable" and "not normal."  I am not solely defined by it. It is mine to do what I please with. If I want to wear it bone straight or kinky or curly or coily or in an afro, I will. My hair does not need to be the topic of discussion, especially outside my community. It is hair, simple and plain. I am not making a statement. I made a choice to stop relaxing my hair for myself. I didn't discuss it with anyone before hand. I just made a choice and stuck with it. It's 

No, my hair does not mean I'm militant. Nor does it make me political. I'm not making a statement. My hair doesn't make me a feminist or a Black Panther or a revolutionary. My beliefs would make me those things. It's just my hair. It is not wrong or unnatural. It is the hair that grows naturally from my scalp. This is the hair that God gave me. I no longer believe that I have to succumb to the acceptance of the way the world believes that my hair should look, feel, or be. That is a very Westernized idea of what is normal Black hair. I am normal by my standards. Also, so is my glorious natural hair! It's my hair, maybe it's the rest of the world that needs to relax. 

Looking Forward

It's New Year's Eve and I'm feeling reflective. So, this post is a two in one. First, I wanna talk about the best thing of my year: my hair. This past year has been an amazing natural hair journey. I've had so truly dope hair days. From braid outs to bantu knot outs to two strand twists to wash and go's, I did it all with my own two hands this year. Most of these styles are trial and error. Some I got right the first time. Others, not so much. But, even when it didn't work, I just tried harder the next time. It's my hair so learning how to work with it is a must. I haven't been to a salon in almost 3 years. This is all me. I am thankful for youtube natural hair vloggers and the hair forums. I am grateful to the natural hair community for all of the information that has been at my fingertips. I did this. I'm so proud of me. Here are my favorite looks/styles of this year. I really fell in love with my own natural hair this year!!

Now, here is the second half. These are 14 questions that needed to be answered before the new year. Let's jump into it! Oh and Happy New Year's people!!!

1. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? *Right now, settling. But that won't be for much longer. 
2. Have you been a friend to yourself? *This year, I have been my own best friend. I had to be.*
3. What was the biggest risk you took this year? *Reached out to someone who hurt me.*
4. What have you been holding onto that you need to let go of? *Everything that was said between the two of us, the life we planned, the love we had.*
5. What was this year’s biggest time waster? How will you make a change? *Biggest time waster were the countless moments spent wondering "what if?" Prayer is the only thing can change it. *
6. In what ways have you supported yourself in being less than? In what ways have you supported yourself in being all that you can be? *I allowed myself to blame me for something that happened to me. I've supported myself by stepping out on faith as far as my writing goes.*
7. Right now, is your life a manifestation of your inner world, or is your inner world a reflection of your outward world? How can you get back into alignment? *My life is a reflection of my outward world. Has been all year. But, 2014 will be the year of manifesting my destiny. This is how I will get back into alignment.*
8. What are 5 things you can do to reconnect? *Stop letting my heart lead me, doing instead of talking, strengthening my faith again, reach out to friends more, keep myself in good spirits.*
9. What lessons can you take away from this year’s relationships? *Things fall apart without warning. You have to be able to function without them. You have to know how to put yourself back together and move forward. No one else will do it for you. Love yourself the most because you are the only person who will take care of your heart. *
10. Have you been compassionate with yourself? With others? *With myself, not so much. With others, maybe a bit too much.*
11. What has brought you the most joy this year? *My family, hands down.*
12. Have you been living in your truth? *More and more.*
13. How do you want to think and feel about yourself twelve months from now? *I want to think more positively. I want to be able to see the sunny side of things again. I want to feel better about everything. I want to be my old self again.*
14. What else do you need to say or do to be complete with this year? *I am so done with this year. I have said everything that I can say, I've written all that I can. I want to leave all of 2013 right here.*

It's My Hair: Fabulous Results

Since I am having the best week with my natural hair, I decided to write about it. The change in weather has been a plus for this naturalista. I've changed my conditioner for my cowash. I'm still using Suave but not its the almond + shea butter conditioner. I am in love with the smell of it. It works wonders on my hair. I am still enamored with the Obia Shampoo Bar. This week, I've been using the Obia Curl Hydration Spray daily. I love the effect it has on my hair. It gives it a shine and my curls seem to pop more. I love that. So, I two strand twisted my damp hair with Curls Unleashed Curl Cream. I let it air dry for a full day. Then that night, I bantu knotted the two strand twists. I sprayed the Obia Curl Hydration Spray on my hair before I went to sleep. The above picture shows how dope my hair came out the next morning. I couldn't be happier with the outcome. I was having a great hair day.  

The pic below is the outcome of bantu knot out with just using the LOC method. I used the Obia Curl Enhancing Custard as the C (cream) for my LOC.  There was a lot of shrinkage here. Also, my hair wasn't as moisturized as I would've liked. I corrected this the next day by adding the Obia Curl Hydration Spray. It worked like a charm. I am really loving my natural hair this winter. With the weather being cooler, my hair styles seem to last longer. Also, I don't have an issue with frizz either. So, for that, I am thankful. I love that I am still learning more about my hair in its natural state over 2 years later. This started out as a simple quest. One that I believed would most likely end up with me going back to relaxers. I do not see that happening. I'm enjoying my hair in a way that I never did before. I take so much more time with my hair now. It's been a journey that I needed to take for myself. Happy Holidays, Naturalistas!!! 

Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner (Part II)

There is absolutely nothing better than free. I LOVE free!! I mean, who doesn't? My lucky winning streak is still going strong. This time I won some perfume and natural hair products. I entered the Express Glam giveaway on Lianne's blog, The Makeup Girl. I was super excited to try this new scent. I have been searching for a new fragrance. My signature scent has been J'adore by Dior for years. I love it but I don't wear it everyday. I needed a new daily scent. This is clearly it. I love the way it smells. There was a little mix-up between me, Lianne and Express. But, she made it right. She also included two extra gifts for me. That made me feel super special. She has a very sunny disposition and great customer service. You guys should go check out her blog.

The second thing I won was a whole line of Obia Natural Haircare products. I entered the contest via Global Couture. I received  the Coconut Shea Shampoo bar, the Curl Hydration Spray, Curl Enhancing Custard, and the Twist Whip Butter. I finally used it on my hair last week. I am in love with the shampoo bar. It lathers so well. I love the smell and my hair was so clean. The Twist Whip Butter was used on a bantu knot out for Thanksgiving. I received so many compliments on my hair. I would say that is a win. The entire line worked extremely well for me and my hair. I will be including them into my weekly wash days. Naturalistas, get into Obia Natural Haircare! I am thankful for the free gifts.