I noticed a hashtag (#) on Instagram that interested me. It was #100Tunes100Days. I do not know where it started but it's music related so I was all in. I decided to focus on the songs that have special memories attached to them. Especially the songs from my childhood that made me into the woman I am today. I thought that this challenge would be better served if I did it on Tumblr. I wanted to do more than just list the song. I wanted a Spotify or Soundcloud or Youtube link to the actual song. As well as a little bit about why I chose that particular song. I am into week 2 of this challenge. It has been really easy for me to choose songs so far. I know it will get harder as the days pass. Feel free to join in if you like. I am having way too much fun with it. You can follow my list of #100Tunes100Days on my Tumblr.
Two: Describe your perfect day in 7 words. - 74°, sunny, beach, carefree, wine, music, HIM.
Three: 7 words you overuse. - Clearly, exactly, right, like, beaucoup, ok, ass.
Four: List 7 things you do before you leave the house. - Evo, keys, purse, lipgloss, charger, lights, lock.
Five: 7 words beginning with the first letter of your name. - Yellow, yours, yesterday, young, yummy, yoga, yoyo -or- kindhearted, kissable, kaleidoscope, knowledgeable, kinky, kinetic, knockout.
December 17th - Lesson Learned - What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?
The most important thing I learned about myself this year is that I can allow myself to be open again. For almost a year and a half, I was very closed off. I was not in the mood or position to let someone into my life or into my heart. I just didn’t want to deal with that. But, I’m in a much better place now. My heart is def open now. I will continue to follow this path of openness, of allowing myself to feel. That is all I can do. And, I know that it will be the best thing ever.
December 18th - Try - What do you wanna try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did or didn’t go for it?
In the following year, I would like to try to write something every day. I am committed to writing because in the words of dream hampton, “writers write.” I wanted to try a few things in 2010. Some of them worked out really well, others not so much. But, either way, I’m thankful for the experience.
December 19th - Healing - What healed you this year? Was it sudden or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?
I realized that there was still hope. I had lost that feeling for a while. So, in a way, I was healed by the possibility of hope. It was def a drip-by-drip evolution. It was a slow and steady process. It was def needed in my life this year. In 2011, I would like to be healed of any negative thoughts or actions. I would love to eliminate them totally. that would be quite great to me.
December 20th - Beyond Avoidance - What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? Bonus: Will you do it?
The one thing I should’ve done was just to go. Take the trip I have to take. I was stopped by my fear. I will do it and soon. Because I know its the pathway to my future.
December 21st - Letter To Your Future Self - I blogged about this already here
December 22nd -Travel - How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year?
In 2010, I did not travel enough. That was not the highlight of 2010. I need to travel internationally. It’s a definite must for 2011. I am craving an island vacation, somewhere exotic though. There are a few places I would to vacation in the next year. Mykonos Island, Greece; Fiji; Belize; Turks and Caicos; Dubai, Ochos Rios, Jamaica; Capri, Italy; and St. Thomas just to name a few. I’ve also never been to NYC or Miami or Vegas. So they are on my must see list as well. I’m just ready to go.
December 23rd - New Name - Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?
If I had to pick a new name, of would be Kelsi. I’ve been in love with this name for a while now. When I have a daughter, I’m sure this will be her name. I think its a very cute name. And, I just really like it
December 24th - Everything’s OK - What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?
The best moment that I can think is New Year’s Day. I just kinda had an epiphany while talking to some family members. I felt lighter as if the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders. I just knew that I would be just fine. That my life was changing. I’ve used that feeling to drive me through this year and will continue to use it in 2011
December 25th – Photo – A present to yourself. Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.
This picture best captures who I am. This was snapped on my way to my best friends wedding. It was taken by my cousin. It best reveals about me that I am genuinely happy about my life & those that I love. This was a very wonderful day.
December 26th - Soul Food -What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul?
The one meal that I remember the most was crab cakes and salad from Semolinas. It has become my new favorite dish. I need to get the recipe. I can’t say it touched my soul though.
December 27th - Ordinary Joy - Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?
Simply seeing my youngest nephew Kole light up when he sees me. He is very attached to his parents and very spoiled. But finally he has warmed up to other people and his recognition and acknowledgement of me was my one joyful ordinary moment of this year.
December 28th - Achieve - What’s the thing you most want to achieve next year? How do you imagine you’ll feel when you get it? Write that feeling down. Then, brainstorm 10things you can do, or 10 new thoughts you can think, in order to experience that feeling today.
The one thing I want to achieve the most next year is conquering my fear and living the life I love and deserve. I’m sure I will feel happy and free and loved and complete and totally blissful. I know the steps I need to take to get me to there. It’s all about stepping out on faith which is huge. But I see my destiny within my grasp.
December 29th - Defining Moment - Describe a defining moment that has affected your life this year.
At the beginning of the year, while having lunch with my cousin and my brother, I had a lightbulb moment. I felt whatever had been wearing me down lift off me. I just knew that everything that I was carrying from 2009 was over. That I would be perfectly fine. And, I was so right. Things I never expected have transpired this year. 30 was a good look.
December 30th - Gift - This month, gifts and gift-giving can seem inescapable. What’s the most memorable gift, tangible or emotional, you received this year?
The best and most unexpected gift I received this year had to be love. You cannot measure it or quantify it or see it. But, I feel it deep inside of me. It was a gift because I didn't know I needed it, deserved it, desired it until it presented itself to me. Isn't that the ultimate gifft?
December 31st - Core Story - What central story is at the core of you, and how do you share it with the world?.
I think my core story is one of love. Because when I love, I love hard and with every thing in me. This is a no brained when it comes to my family. But, what I've realized is that this is also true about me when it comes to the people I let into my life. Once you're in my heart, you're in. This year, I found myself in a situation where I had no choice but to open my heart. Love has a way of doing that. I didn't know I needed it, wasn't even looking for it. I cannot wait to see how my core story grows in the new year.
This30 day blog challenge has been a very good way for me to write. The topics very varied and I loved them. Some were much easier to write on than others. But, I did them nonetheless. Finishing was a big accomplishment for me and my blogging. I can't express how great it feels to jump head first back into writing on a daily basis. I've been experiencing a bit of writer's block. I think it's safe to say that it's clearly gone now!! Woo-hoo :) So, my parting words to this challenge are as followed. I am thankful and grateful for finding you through other blogs.
Choosing my favorite memory was a hard one. It was summer 2003 on a warm summer August night in New Orleans. My friends and I were gathered at this little dive bar in the city to wish our girl farewell. She was moving to another city for a job. The drinks were flowing and the music was blasting. The entire group was enjoying the night. We then ended up @ the House of Blues for more music, drinking and dancing. Our night ended @ the Trolley Stop for breakfast. It was an incredible night. It was also the last night we spent with Shauna. I wouldn't go into that. But, this memory sticks out in my mind.
I still remember it like it was yesterday. My first real kiss was with a guy I'll call TT. I was 13 & in the 9th grade. He & I had last period together. Our teacher was an old, disgruntled man who always put kids out of class on a daily. TT and I had been flirting up a storm since the beginning of the school year. There were stolen glances, passed love notes, and hands being held while walking home. I was enamored with this guy. He was a tall chocolate colored guy with a smile and dimples to die for. He was older than me.
On this particular Wednesday, TT & I were the two exiled students. He & I roamed the upstairs corridor of our school laughing and talking. I felt butterflies whenever I was near him. He stopped walking and grabbed me into a big hug. This guy smelled incredible. Just like Cool Waters. He caressed my face and said to me "Baby girl, I really wanna kiss you." I just nodded in agreement. His lips touched mine and I felt it down to my toes. I closed my eyes to savor the moment. My first kiss!!! OMG!! His hands pulled me closer to him. His whole essence engulfed me. We kissed for what seemed liked hours. My hands were wrapped around his neck and I kept running my fingers over his earlobes. I knew he like that. This was it. After all the months of flirting with this boy, it had paid off. He went from kissing me to kissing my neck to kissing my lips again. When we finally finished kissing, he looked at me and smiled. He said "I knew your lips would be that sweet, baby girl." (yes, the brother was smooth as hell @ 15!!) I have to say I had a perfect real first kiss. And, I am thankful for it.
* I want to write a book that people revel in. * I'm ready to make a huge move. I need to change my physical location soon. * I want to be a better me. * I want to travel...island hop. * I want to get married and have kids.
On Sunday, I wore a dress. A cute & simple A-line cotton dress. It's blue, black, teal and white stripes. I wore some flat metallic sandals, silver hoops, multiple silver bangles, and a cute silver ring that I love. Simple and cute. I love the way it fits me. It's comfortable.
This week was long, hot, rainy, fun and informative. Glad it's over and that I made it to the weekend. It has rained literally every day this week. I mean, not just a simple sprinkle but the torrential downpour. And, after the rain comes the heat. Seriously, it feels like hell in the N.O. right now. This week wasn't full of surprises which is always awesome. Just a very normal by the book week for me. I am grateful for that!
This is day 12 of this blogging challenge and its the 14th. Twelve/Fourteen is also my birthday. Those numbers are also the name of my blog. I thought that was very ironic and wanted to share it with you guys. Anywho, on to the topic at hand, what's in my bag.
* Yellow wallet * Burt's Bees Strawberry lipgloss * Avon's Glazewear in Clear * NYC's Clear Mascara * Covergirl Black Mascara * A comb * A ponytail holder * A calendar * Keys * Cash (sometimes...I'm usually a debit girl) * My camera * Benadryl * Family pics * Pre travel charger
I am the oldest of 7. I have 3 brothers: Kenneth Jr (deceased), Kendrick (in the 1st pic to the right), & Senio (in the second pic to the right). I also have 3 sisters: Kennesha, Shanterri, & Matika. That's my sisters and I in the last picture. My relationships with them are all very different. I will fight to the death for all of them and protect them fiercely with everything in me. Being the oldest is akin to being a Mom. I love them and want nothing but the best for them. Yes, we have arguments and disagreements at times. But, that's what siblings, what families do. In the end, love is all that really matters the most.
This is technically what I wore yesterday but it works as well.
Orchid/Navy sheer shirt with a orchid cami underneath
Black slacks
Orchid peep toe pumps (which I love, love so much so that I have them in 3 colors)
Multiple black bracelets
Silver hoops and silver ring
My beliefs! I'm just gonna list the things I believe in.
* I believe in ME. - That is the most important thing. It's not a conceited issue either. My confidence in myself determines how far I will go. I don't let anyone else's real or make believe perception of me determine how I see myself. I see me clearly when I look into a mirror or introspectively.
* I believe in God. - I'm a Christian, Baptist but I'm not overly religious. My relationship with God is my own and cannot be defined or quantified by any one else.
* I am Pro-Life - for myself and Pro-Choice for everyone else. I don't think I have the right to decide anything for any other able bodied person.
* I'm a Democrat - I'm also a President Barack Obama supporter (since 2004). I believe in politics & government.
* I believe in trust - Loyalty and honesty also fall into this category for me. Once you have my trust, you're golden. But, if you ever do anything to jeopardize that, I will be done.
* I believe in karmic energy. - what you put out is what you get back. I'm not a perfect person, but I try my best to do right by people.
* I believe in solo dating. - I think a person needs to spend time with themselves & enjoy their own company. I go to the movies, get spa pedicures, and go out to eat by myself every once and a while. If I don't love my company, how can I expect anyone else to?
* I believe that black is beautiful. - In my opinion, black people as a whole are beaten down on in the press and in general. I think its important to have a healthy outlook on who you are, on your race and love for it all. I make sure my nieces and nephews know that the color of their skin may differ but all of their black is beautiful.
* I believe in love. - Romantic love. I strongly believe that its out there for everyone. Love isn't a tangible thing. I am waiting to experience an adult love. I feel it will be great.
~Disclaimer~ This list may grow exponentially as the days go by.
Today was a simple, lazy Sunday. I woke up around 5:15am. I had a 3 hour conversation with him. I'm sure I fell asleep a few times during that conversation. lol. I ate an orange for breakfast. I watched "Love & Basketball" and "Brown Sugar." These are two of my favorite movies. I had a late lunch @ P.F. Chang's with a friend. I had dynamite shrimp, brown rice, crab wontons and a Mojito. The food, drinks and conversation were all food for my soul this Sunday. It felt like the thermometer was turned up to hell. It's soooo freaking hot here. I'm beyond ready for fall. I'm home now waiting for "Big Brother" to come on. I will most likely end my day the way I began it...another hour long conversation. In the words of O'shea Jackson, "today was a good day!!"
My definition of love varies. Love is a verb…an action word. So it means that ones actions need to line up with ones words. It's the butterflies in the stomach and the happiness in the voice when you see that person. It's when you care about that person's well being more than anything. It's the knowing that your life would be a lot dimmer without them in it. Love is a roller coaster…the highs are incredible…the lows are the worst…but all of it is worth the ride. I can’t tell you what love is, but I know it when I’m in it and when I feel it. It’s like air. I just know.
My parents were both born in New Orleans, La. They met & fell in love in high school. At 19 & 20 respectively, they were married and had me. After years of being together and not being together, they were divorced in 1997 my senior year of high school. I lost my Dad @ 18. A very sad and angry time in my life that I'm not ready to get into.
My Mom has always been the backbone of who I am. She worked 2 and 3 jobs to take care of me and my brother. I've never ever felt unloved or alone. Things weren't always easy for us, but she did her best. We never went without food, clothing, housing, or electricity. She is the epitome of a mother doing whatever it takes to take care of her kids. She always put us first. She instilled so many values in me. We've always been able to talk (minus those teenage years when I "thought" she was my enemy). She's one of my best friends and one of the best women I know. She's not perfect and her flaws make her even more down to earth. I love to clown with her about everything. She's very affectionate, always telling us she loves us & hugging us. That alone has made me a very affectionate and loving person. I'm sure my brothers, sisters, cousins, friends, nephews, nieces and Godkids all know how much I love them. Because of my Mom, I'm always telling them. I appreciate all the things she sacrificed for me.
My Dad was my twin. We were so much alike. We bumped heads often. Mostly because I would call him on his bs. I hated that he wasn't a father to all 6 of us. He was a joker, hilarious sense of humor, great smile, and nice eyes. I just wished he would've been more of a Father to me. I'm the oldest and I needed him. Hell, I still do. He kinda never really grew up. I miss his laugh and the way he used to say my name. I never doubted that he loved me. I was his baby girl, his firstborn. He cherished me. As a kid, he was my all. I really miss him.
So, that's my take on Yolanda and Kenneth, my parents. Everything that I am, fundamentally, is because of them. I am thankful for them.
When I read that today's topic was "your first love," I was conflicted. I could have gone the normal route and made this post about the first guy I loved. But, in reality, that's not a good story to tell. We met, became friends, fell in love, and fell out of love. End scene here lol. I decided to blog about my first real love: music.
My earliest memories of family life with my Mom and Dad involve music. They both loved music. I'm guessing that's where I get it from. My Dad was a DJ on the side. There was always music playing in my house. My dad & I would sing to each other. I knew every song on the radio and a lot that weren't. Music always brings me back to my happy place. My parents were always amazed by my musical ear. I could tell you the name of a song & who sang it within seconds. It was my thing. The first album (yes, album. I'm a 30 y/o woman :) I ever owned was New Edition's Candy Girl. It was a gift from my Dad along with a record player. I listened to it everyday non-stop. I was a fan from the first time I heard their prepubescent voices. I remember I was a Teena Marie fanatic as a little girl. I also remember crying when my Dad told me she was White. Granted I was like 4 and believed that everyone was like me. I told him "Daddy, Teena Marie is brown like me!!" He had to buy her album to convince me. I still loved her nonetheless. I was a very strange child...who grew into a weird women. But, it's part of my charm :)
Music has always been the most consistent thing in my life. If I'm happy, it enhances my mood. If I'm sad, it lifts me up. I listen to a little of everything musically. If the music is right and the lyrics are on point, I'm good. No, great. I've always turned to music. It inspires me to write. I guess my love of music will always be in me. I can never really claim a favorite song...because it changes daily lol. My favorite singers and groups are Teena Marie, Prince, New Edition, Destiny's Child, Jay-Z, and Eve. My musical tastes are really random though. I could go from listening to Jay-z to Christina Aguilera to 112 to Paramore to Shania Twain and end with Linkin Park. I just like what/who I like. I don't see color in music. I just pursue what moves me. And, that will always be music, my first love.
My father made my name up. Up until I was an adult, I've never met anyone with my name. And, the few women that I've met with my government name were named after me. That, to me, makes me very special and unique. People have mispronounced my name for 30 years now. I prefer the abbreviated form of my name. I think it fits the woman that I am, the woman that my mother raised me to be. I'm a 30 year old, single woman with no kids, no pets (but I want a puppy). I am a writer, a lover of the arts, born and bred New Orleans girl. I'm a daughter, a sister, a cousin, an auntie, a friend, a Nanna all rolled into one.
I'm a writer by nature, a poet by nurture. I love words and language. Always have, always will. I live for music. It's a guaranteed way to change or enhance my mood. A good book and great music is my idea of a good time. I'm sarcastic and funny and opinionated and spoiled and a wonderful friend. My sense of humor is seriously outta this world lol. I love that about myself though. Laughter is the best and only drug I need. I love & enjoy my family, especially my 4 nephews and 2 nieces. I'm the oldest of 7 and I relish being the boss :) true story.
This is my second or third time trying this blogging thing. I'm more dedicated to sticking to it this time. Time will tell right? Ok, day one done. Day two is up next!
